What are the best forms of office revenge?

I have a friend in need of help:

As some of you know, I am leaving my job today.

Over the past two weeks I have pretty much exhausted all the skiving opportunities to be had in this place including Post-It origami and forming a steel band with the filing cabinets.

Now I turn to you lovely lot to help me decide the best way of having my revenge on the petty, bitchy, inbred motherfathers in my office.

Suggestions on a virtual postcard please.

What are your best (LEGAL!) tips for office revenge?

xx

If you're gonna get an individual do what I did, stitch up the sleeves on their jackets. for the general office put boot polish on the ear part of the phone hand sets, then take out the cord from the base unit wrap tape round it and put it back in then when their phone rings and they lift it up not only do they get a black ear from the boot polish but will also think that they are getting strange phone calls. glue stationery to the desk. put some laxative (not very strong one) in the coffee jar!

have fun and get the ballesteros back!

Put syrup of ipecac in the coffee.

http://www.utmb.edu/setpc/ipecac.htm

.

I have LOTS,but can't post them here(kids),email me?

If you can do it.......

get some fish from your canteen, and hide it in some tissue behind the radiator, or somewhere warm where no one will notice.

pee in the kettle.

delete some files on the computer.

adjust everyones chairs when they arent there.

send a global email but set it send send a week from today.

the fish one is the best though.... hehehe

good luck x x

let me know what you do

Make up and spread subtle rumours about everyone so you set them all against each other...they'll be pettily bitching for many years to come....muhahaha

put salt/sugar/valium in the water cooler

Laxative chocolate... the leaving pressy

Getting out of there and leaving them all behind.

Superglue the phone handset to the base (if you have a phone each)

Take some of the letters out from keyboards and swop them round with others so they end up with 2 or 3 same letters each

Hide prawns in their drawers when you leave where they can't find them for weeks

Send round an office memo from the office manager saying they haven't contributed enough to your leaving present and to add more to the box on your desk.

Ask your boss for a word in private. When you are alone begin to tell him/her that you really appreciate the help they've given blah, blah, then suddenly scream and run out. When they follow you out accuse them of fondling you and making a pass and that you will be suing them in tribunal. Then simply walk out the office - boozer bound. Its not pretty but it is one way to leave with a final f*uck u to your boss, and the numbskulls who remain working there have malicious gossip aplenty.

I messed up the filling syetem big time and throwed away files which I knew whould make there life's difficult.

Mess up their computers.

I worked with a guy who was the best salesman in the region, so he won a car for top figures. But on the sly he was setting up his own business and stealing customers from the company. He found out one evening that the GM had found him out and he would be sacked in the morning. So he went to the garage, picked up the spanking new Saab, took his kids to school, drove to the office, went in and got sacked. The car lost value cos it was then second hand, garage wouldnt take it back, company was left with it, GM was well and truly suckered. the rest of us are still laughing.

I suppose thats a bit specific though, it'd be a bit of a coincidence if it fitted your situation!