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Long joke I read. just want to share.?


Once upon a time, there lived a man who had a terrible passion for baked beans. He loved them, but they always had an embarrassing and somewhat lively reaction on him. One day he met a girl and fell in love. When it was apparent that they would marry, he thought to himself, 'She'll never go through with the marriage with me carrying on like this, so he made the supreme sacrifice and gave up beans. Shortly after that they were married.

A few months later, on the way home from work, his car broke down and since they lived in the country, he called his wife and told her that he would be late because he had to walk. On his way home, he passed a small cafe and the wonderful aroma of baked beans overwhelmed him.

Since he still had several miles to walk he figured he could walk off any ill affects before he got home. So he went in and ordered, and before leaving had three extra large helpings of baked beans. All the way home he putt-putted. He putt-putted down one hill and putt-putted up the next. By the time he arrive home he felt reasonably safe.

His wife met him at the door and seemed somewhat excited. She exclaimed, "Darling, I have the most wonderful surprise for you for dinner tonight!" She put a blindfold on him, and led him to his chair at the head of the table and made him promise not to peak.

At this point he was beginning to feel another one coming on. Just as his wife was about to remove the blindfold, the telephone rang. She again made him promise not to peek until she returned, and she went to answer the phone.

While she was gone, he seized the opportunity. He shifted his weight to one leg and let go. It was not only loud, but ripe as a rotten egg. He had a hard time breathing, so he felt for his napkin and fanned the air about him. He had just started to feel better, when another urge came on. He raised his leg and rriiipppp! It sounded like a diesel engine revving, and smelled worse. To keep from gagging, he tried fanning his arms a while, hoping the smell would dissipate. Things had just about returned to normal when he felt another urge coming. He shifted his weight to his other leg and let go. This was a real blue ribbon winner; the windows shook, the dishes on the table rattled and a minute later the flowers on the table were dead. While keeping an ear tuned in on the conversation in the hallway, and keeping his promise of staying blindfolded, he carried on like this for the next ten minutes, farting and then fanning each time with his napkin.

When he heard the phone farewells (indicating the end of his loneliness and freedom) he neatly laid his napkin on his lap and folded his hands on top of it. Smiling contentedly, he was the picture of innocence when his wife walked in.

Apologizing for taking so long, she asked if he had peeked at the dinner table. After assuring her he had not peeked, she removed the blindfold and yelled, "Surprise!"

To his shock and horror, there were twelve dinner guests seated around the table for his surprise birthday party.

good twist at the end!!! i thought the suprise would be beans. i loved that joke!!! i've never heard it be4!!!

good one

Ahhahaha..Thats a good one so hes wife didnt but they did


Thank a lot for this one Hahahahahaha!!!

ROflll!!!!!!!!

Ahhh that would suck! hahaha

hahahahaha

脰h! 枚h!
脰h! 枚h!
脰h! 枚h!
脰h! 枚h!
脰h! 枚h!
脰h! 枚h!

wonder why no one said anything?!
hahaha

cheers
鈼凴fD鈻?/div>

  • 1 month ago

LMFAO I JUST READ THE LAST PARAGRAPH this jokes so long that its not even worth laughing

I heard that one before on funny.com.
still a good joke though..

hehe ... all the while, i thought the wife prepared baked beans for dinner ... and he was all preparing himself for that delicious meal ...

wow ... what a twist at the end ...

i guess the 12 guests were more of shock and horror sitting around him ...

anyway ... happy birthday ! are there any candles around ?!?

YAY!

lol with the blue ribbon winner i thought it would kill the guests =P

LOL!

LOL!


LOL!


LOL!


LOL!


LOL!

I heard the same joke different ending:

Apologizin for taking so long,she asked had he peeked ?
assuring her he had not she removed the blindfold, and
asked, what happened to the guest ? what guest, he asked
There were 12 guest here for your surprise Birthday Party.

HAHAHHAA OMG THAT WAS GREAT!!! WOOOOH OMG great keep it up!

kinda gross but lawl

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