Most Embarrassing Moments
A radio station in Australia ran a phone-in competition to find the most
embarrassing moment in listener's lives.
The top four were:
4th PLACE: "While in line at the bank one afternoon, my toddler decided to
release some pent-up energy and run amok. I was finally able to grab
hold of her after receiving looks of disgust and annoyance from other customers. I told her angrily to start behaving and she looked me in the eye and
told me in a voice just as threatening, "If you don't let me go right now, I will
tell Grandma that I saw you kissing Daddy's Willie last night."
After this enlightening exchange, the silence was deafening. Even the
tellers stopped what they were doing. I mustered the last of my
dignity and walked out of the bank, with my daughter in tow. The last thing I heard as the doors closed behind me were screams of laughter."
3rd PLACE: "It was the day before my 18th birthday. I was living at home,
but my parents had gone out for the evening, so I invited my girlfriend over
for a romantic night alone. As we lay in bed after making love, we heard the
telephone ringing down stairs. I suggested to my girlfriend that I give her a piggy-back ride down to the phone. Since we didn't want to miss the call,
we didn't have time to get dressed. When we got to the bottom of the
stairs, the lights suddenly came on and a whole crowd of people yelled 'SURPRISE'.
My entire family - parents, and all, as well as my friends, were standing
there. My girlfriend and I were frozen there on the spot in a state of
shock and embarrassment for what seemed like an eternity. Since then, no one
in my family has planned any surprise parties."
2nd PLACE: A lady picked several items at a discount store. When she
finally got up to the checkout, she learned that one of the items had no price
tag. The checkout girl got on the public address system, which boomed out
across everyone to hear, "Price check for Tampax super-size."
Then it got worse. Someone at the rear of the store apparently misunderstood the word 'Tampax' for 'Thumbtacks', a guy, his voice booming over the same
public address system said, "Do you want the kind that you push in
with your thumb or the kind that you belt in with a hammer?"
1st PLACE: AND THE WINNER IS..... This happened at a major Australian
University. During a biology lecture a professor was discussing the high glucose
levels found in semen. A young woman raised her hand and asked, "If I understand you correctly, you are saying there is as much glucose in male semen as in sugar?"
The professor responded, "Yes, that's correct", adding some statistical data
to his lecture. The girl asked, "Then why doesn't it taste sweet?"
After a stunned silence, the whole class burst out laughing. The poor girl
turned bright red and, as she realised exactly what she had inadvertently
said, she picked up her books and, without another word, walked out of the
class. As she was heading for the door, the professor's reply was classic.
Totally straight faced, he answered her question.
"It doesn't taste sweet because the taste-buds for sweetness are on the tip of your tongue and not at the back of your throat." I was talking about cherry tomatoes the other day and why I love them so much. My boss walked in to the office just to hear 'I love it, you pop it in your mouth and suck till it squirts everywhere'.
Oh dear, did I nearly die! sliding down a big hill and hurting my you know wot Lifes too short to get embarrassed Those are good...I love that last one! It would be much funnier if any of these things had actually happened, and not just been made up/seen in films/etc. That last one was classic!! Oh my Goodness that's hilarious!! hahaha brilliant those were awsome!!!! thank God nothing has ever happened to me that embarrassing.....i don't know how i would handle it!!!! thats awesome!!!! nice- no embarrassing moments for me, though- not that good anyways ah...okey... funny? sure! why not? its sweet! i've tasted it! LOL brillant! now thats funny VERY funny!! And the Question is: Do I take this Q and A too seriously? Yet, after reading this I have tasted my semen with the tip of my tongue and it is not sweet. Besides that most of my partners do not keep me in the back of their throat to the end. Personally I prefer to ejaculate on their lips while they are using their tongue on the glans. Never heard about sweetness. I doubt about this glucose levels thing... Or should I try other people's semen? Questions, questions, questions... Pure 100% class you couldn't think of better if you tried !!!!!!!! 4 and first place are the best. i cant even compete with that. you had my office crying with tears. thanks so much. so she admitted it, it not like every single girl there and probably some guys know exactly what it tastes like nice one sithy,the third one cracked me up. Ha~! Truly classic! effing crazy!! i oved the bank one and the last one crazy!! oh and does 16 coun't as an adult?? Funny... Excellent question, I have a couple, totally true stories that have happened to my friends.
1st: A friend of mine was getting intimate with his girlfriend, he bent her over her bed and was giving it his all when her brother knocked on the door. Instead of waiting, he just barged straight in only giving my friend and his g/f time to stand up a little. The brother didn't guess what was going on as he was on the other side of the bed, and he started to ask my friend how his new job was going. After a few minutes of conversation the brother turned away towards the door and they thought they had got away with it. He opened the door and then quickly turned back around, "I nearly forgot what I came in for, I'm just going to borrow one of your CDs". Quick as a flash he dashed around the other side of the bed and searched through her CD collection. He looked behind to ask his sister something and as he did he noticed her panties around her ankles, and my friends pants around his! The brother is one of those smart asses, so he just pointed at them and laughed. My friend and his g/f couldn't move a muscle because the train was still in the tunnel! The brother ran downstairs and told the entire family. My friend then had to sit with the entire family and have lunch with them as this happened while they were waiting for Sunday dinner to be made!
2nd: Another friend of mine was reading a magazine in his car waiting for his girlfriend to finish work. It wasn't pornographic, but it had a women with a bikini on the front cover. He looked up to see if his girlfriend was ready, he couldn't see her but he noticed an old women staring at him, so he smiled at her. She gave him a funny look and rushed off. After a few minutes he got a call from his girlfriend and she told him she was working so late and asked him to pick her up in a couple of hours. He decided to go home and have something to eat. He was just about to reach his house when a police car came racing up behind him, lights flashing. He pulled up and opened his window. The policemen told him to get out and then threw him over the bonnet before handcuffing him. "We've got you now you sick bastard" one of the policemen said. At the time he was still living with his mother, who was watching all this from the window of her house. She came out screaming at the policemen, who told her that they were arresting her son on suspicion of masturbating in public and various counts of flashing at schoolgirls. It turned out that at the time of his arrest somebody had been going around flashing at schoolgirls. They questioned him all day, trying to get him to admit the offenses. When he wouldn't they got a search warrant and searched his bedroom. They found all his porno magazines and dvds, and even one of his girlfriends vibrators (much to his mothers embarrassment). They interviewed him again, slammed a box load of his porno onto the table (and the vibrator) and demanded that he confessed as they knew he was a pervert. When he wouldn't they demanded to know why he had a vibrator. He told them it was his girlfriends, but they didn't believe him so they called her in. His girlfriend was scared at being asked to come to the police station so she took her father with her and had to admit (in front of her father) that the vibrator was hers. Apparently it was quite a big, mean looking one too! Anyway, after further inquiries they let my friend go due to lack of proof. He split up with his girlfriend shortly afterwards, saying he couldn't bare to go to her folks house anymore as her dad just used to stare at him. To this day he says that his mother doesn't look at him quite the same way she used too either. It was his birthday a few weeks later, so we all got him mugs that read 'World's Biggest Pervert'. The first one i heard already and the third one was bleh but the second and fourth one were extremely funny. HA HA liked the one that came in 4th LMAO. OMG that is sooo funny. I feel bad for these people OMG TOO FUNNY! i feel bad for them all though=[ Well, one swallow doth not a sucker make. That is classic!
OFPMLOL
Keep it up! Oh my word!! i dont think those people can actually get past those moments!!!
so funny! a girl was wearing tie up tongs, but i got caught in the chair and pulled the whole thing off. That was so funny!! true story! uni in central london! | 