Social Problems?

I have had serious social problems since I was a young child. I fear that it is getting worse and I do not know why; Even at work I find myself uncomfortable with certain situations, even if im on the telephone. I forget what to say and I end up studdering and pausing sometimes to not even finish what I wanted to say. I will stand-up friends sometimes to go as far as not answer the phone or door just to avoid a normal social event. If anyone can offer advise it would be greatly appreciated.

I have the same problem..maybe worse..I have got so bad in the past to where I didn't leave my house for weeks at a time. I get nervous when the door bell rings and won't answer it or stress days in advance prior to having to go to a doctor visit or a meeting ect. Medication wise..I find Paxil and Xanax to be a very good combination to help battle anxiety and social phobias. Of course counseling is also a must. Most people who have never had these problems do not understand the fear and stress even the most simple situations can cause people like us..I feel your pain and hope you find some type of treatment that will give you the freedom to live your life more. That is one of the biggest things to me..I feel like I have missed out on so much due to Anxiety. A lot of people end up turning to drugs and alcohol to deal I did in the past....Good Luck!



Social phobia is a highly prevalent yet often overlooked psychiatric disorder that can cause severe disability but fortunately has shown responsiveness to specific pharmacotherapy and psychotherapy. Recognition of its essential clinical features and the use of brief, targeted screening questions can improve detection within family practice settings. Cognitive behavioral therapy, with or without specific antidepressant therapy, is the evidence-based treatment of choice for most patients. Adjunctive use of benzodiazepines can facilitate the treatment response of patients who need initial symptom relief. The use of beta blockers as needed has been found to be helpful in the treatment of circumscribed social and performance phobias. Treatment planning should consider the patient's preference, the severity of presenting symptoms, the degree of functional impairment, psychiatric and substance-related comorbidity, and long-term treatment goals.

A. A marked and persistent fear of one or more social or performance situations in which the person is exposed to unfamiliar people or to possible scrutiny by others. The individual fears that he or she will act in a way (or show anxiety symptoms) that will be humiliating or embarrassing. note: In children, there must be evidence of the capacity for age-appropriate social relationships with familiar people and the anxiety must occur in peer settings, not just in interactions with adults.

B. Exposure to the feared social situation almost invariably provokes anxiety, which may take the form of a situationally bound or situationally predisposed panic attack. note: In children, the anxiety may be expressed by crying, tantrums, freezing, or shrinking from social situations with unfamiliar people.

C. The person recognizes that the fear is excessive or unreasonable. NOTE: In children, this feature may be absent.

D. The feared social or performance situations are avoided or else are endured with intense anxiety or distress.

E. The avoidance, anxious anticipation, or distress in the feared social or performance situation(s) interferes significantly with the person's normal routine, occupational (academic) functioning or social activities or relationships, or there is marked distress about having the phobia

How to Bring Severe Social Anxiety Under Control
Talk to a psychologist, psychiatrist, or a medical professional who can help you deal with the condition. Whether your medical practioner prescribes medication, cognitive therapy, or any other form of treatment, they should be the ones you should contact.
Surround yourself with a support network. It can be friends, family, or anyone you feel will help and support you. You can join a support group. Do research on the internet, it's a treasure chest of information. Having people around who care helps a lot.
Retrain your brain. Put up little post-its on the wall, fridge, mirror, behind the door. Wherever you can see them. Write messages like "I am a beautiful person". "I am deserving". "I am happy". "I can do anything I put my mind to". Or any other inspirational phrases that you can think of.
Take baby steps with a little bit of exposure and treat yourself when you have completed your goals. For example, if you have a fear of taking buses, one day get on a bus and stay on for 1 or 2 stops. You're slowly exposing yourself to the situation that you are afraid of, and slowly learning to conquer your fear. This is what they call baby steps. Don't start big, start small.
Treat yourself. Take the time to pamper yourself. Go on a nature walk by yourself, take a bath, go window shopping, do whatever makes you feel good.
Learn to relax with different breathing techniques.
Think positive. Don't watch the news. They focus on the gloom and doom in the world and rarely report the good stuff. You don't need that.
Become passionate about something...anything. This is the only life we have be happy.
When you feel anxiety coming on, tuck both your thumbs inside your fists. (Try it now.) This helps you breathe, which helps you control the onset of the attack. (It also works for asthma and stuffy heads. It's weird, but it really does work.)

welcome to my world..it's a living hell. I can do good at work and around relatives but in public I find that I mumble or say things too quickly and it comes out wrong. It sucks!

Good luck...

It's called social anxiety. There are lots of others who experience the same thing. You should make yourself do things you don't want to do. That's the only way to get over the fear, face it. Work on it a little at a time. There are also places that you can go to talk to someone and even get meds if needed. However those are only a temporary fix. You are the one who is going to have to decide if your going to let this fear of socializing take you over.

Sounds like you are suffering from anxiety. All you need to do is go see your Dr and he/she can put you on a mild anti-anxiety medication like Ativan. You'll be fine...good luck Sweetie!