So i wrote this poem for english class?

The last time I saw Philly was the summer of 鈥?3,
She told me I鈥檇 be in her heart,
She鈥檇 never forget me,
And as she sits there in her black and white on the other end of the telephone,
She says one day she鈥檒l find the light,
And be well enough to come back home,
She told me she鈥檇 see me off to Notre Dame,
That I鈥檇 make something of my life,
She believed in everything I did,
And then I got that phone call late last night,
As I sit there debating on what classes to take,
I didn鈥檛 even know that my aunt鈥檚 life was at stake,
As I answer my cell,
My dads ready to tell,
About the horrible news he just heard,
The pain and heartbreak we all have to go through,
Is so unexpected and very absurd,
Philly passed away last night,
8:00, April 1st,
She鈥檚 in a better place, I guess,
I don鈥檛 want to think of the worst,
Although I haven鈥檛 seen her in just about 5 years,
That doesn鈥檛 stop the heartbreak,
And it doesn鈥檛 cure the tears,
Philly was the greatest woman,
Warm and good at heart,
And though her years have gone and passed,
We鈥檒l never be apart

what do you think?

sad.... but nice that she can live in you, be with you.
That you can take her with you even in your English class.
As for the poem itself, poetry permits everything,
It's freestyle adds to sentiment
However if you are able to work on it and transform the verses, you'll have more than sentiment, you'll have rythm like music: And that is what great poetry is about.

sad poem, I hope it's not true to you.
if it is - i'm sorry. but truth be told , I don't like. You are trying too hard. You should just write about how you feel and leave out all the rest.

Don't change a word dude. Art is in the eye of the beholder. You cheapen your art by letting others commercialize it. It may never be a best seller or make you rich. But it will always mean to you and your aunt that through the tears of goodbye, your relationship was beautiful. I'm sorry for your loss, and envious of the love.

dude, that made me cry. and i can never produce tears. but i did.!!