Should I be concerned?

My husband has been distant over the past few days. In the past two days we have lost two pets. The loss has been hard for him, but especially for me since they were mine. He was his normal self on Monday but after we got home he barely spoke to me. Tuesday, basically the same way. Last night after I came home and found out that my pet died he hugged me, but after that he sat down in his recliner and moped the rest of the night. The is not his typical self. Usually he is very affectionate towards me. We had a blizzard on Saturday and were not able to leave our house for 2 days. I have a little bit of problem putting things in bags then when I get ready I put them in their proper place. He said that I have a hoarding problem and that I might need counseling. Everyone has their quirks, leaving things in bags is just mine. He has a friend who
dislikes me. He shares an office with him at work. I think this friend is influencing him with his negative talk about me. Any advice

He obviousy was VERY affected by the loss of the pets, and is lashing out at you, trying to find some solace in it. Don't be overly concerned about it. I know it hurts, but he will be back to himself in a few days most likely. Good Luck!

It's funny how the little things we thought were cute in the beginning find a way to irritate you later.
It's possible this other guy is influencing him.
Why don't you come right out and ask him what is wrong. If he says nothing then say why have you changed.
Good Luck!

i aggree that his friend could be turning him against you in a sense. you really need to talk with him, and ask him whats going on. i really dont like to say this, but there is a possibility he is cheating...

He maybe feeling the loss of your pets just as much as you, as for his work mate, your the one he loves and chooses to live with, do you think he wouldn't of married you if he didn't love you?

Stop being a typical female making innuendo's and false lies in your head and look at the facts.

when did he start working with friend?

You've got a few problems here. Sorry you lost a pet and yes you both mourned over the loss, but your behavior of putting things in bags needs to be addressed with a counselor. If you have more than a couple bags that are not put away, yes you have a problem. If your bags do not get put away in a day or two than yes, you have a problem. Your husband has looked to a friend for advise since suggestions have not worked at home. Look for professional help.

Talk to him, Ask him what's wrong? (what actually happened to your animals anyway?) How long have ya'll been married?
Were ya'll close before? Tell him that if anything needs to be resolved, that you have to communicate and tell each other what your feeling. you can't read minds. And tell him that you two are more important than that friend and that he should take up for you if that so called friend of his talks bad about you. That kind of influence can make a person think, so maybe he just needs to get a few things out. But be calm about it. Tell him you are concerned because you love him and that you can tell something isn't right. Maybe he will open up to you and talk. If he doesn't want to talk about it, then tell him "ok, well I love you and when you are ready, I am ready to listen." But not in a smart @ss way. It could be something more personal to him that he has to deal with on his own. But give him that chance.
Pet peeves can be delt with, It has to be something deeper than that.
Good luck to you!

Your paranoid, he doesnt know what to say to you about your pets, hes stuck in the house for two days, hello... thats depressing right there, just put things away save your marriage, his friend at work so what do all your friends love him?? no didnt think so

talk to him about this.

he my just be depressed about the pets. He could also be stressed about work, etc.

Just talk to him, and see what the issue is.

But its not ok for his friend to trash talk you to anyone, especially your husband!

tell him that you love him, and support him, and you wouldn't let people talk bad about you. And you need the same from him. He needs to show you respect by not letting his friend trash talk you at work, or any other time.

My boyfriends twin brother doesn't like me, and I had to make my guy understand that just because I'm not there doesn't mean its ok for his brother to talk bad about me. And its even more important for him to stand up for me when I'm not there. That is what shows me that he doesn't agree with his brother, and he respects and loves me enough to not tolerate anyone trash talking me.

Good luck with this one!

The loss of a pet can be devistating to some people. Pets are like a part of a member of the family. They give love, attention and affection and ask for nothing in return really. (I assume cause I don't speak dog or cat) Your husband maybe upset at the loss of the pets, that is a hard blow to take especially that close together.

If he seems distant, then ask him if he is ok. Don't expect him to come home and just blurt it all out. Sometimes guys are like dealing with children. WHen there is a problem, they mope, all the time waiting for someone to notice and ask. It is like a cry for help without really asking for it. To ask means that he needs to admit to himself he needs your help and that alone can be a big blow to the male ego.

As for you bag issue, obsesive compulsive is the term and it is something that many people do. I am much the same way except that I rule my life with schedules. If I break it or am forced to change it I become edgy and disoriented.

Your right, we all have quirks it is what makes us who we are. Unless the things we do are harmful or destructive then not worth the effort.

This friend at work, well that is something that hubby needs to address. Out of respect for you, hubby needs to tak this guy down a notch. No man should ever accept trash talk about his wife from another man or woman. They can talk, he can voice an oppinion so to speak but not in a manner that is disrespectful. Teminology like, my old lady, the hag, ice-queen etc are just wrong. I call my wife upper management, the warden all the time, but it is a respect issue with me because I know my place and know who rules the house. I am just the minion and do what I am told. Safer that way.

Definately talk to him. It could be the loss of the pets but perhaps something else is bothering him. The fact that he suggested you see a counsellor rings alarm bells for me. When people say things like that its often because they are really upset about something themselves, its possible he sees your distress but because of his own problems is feeling frustrated and overloaded. How long has he worked with this friend at work?