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If you were me, How would you respond to my Girlfriend's E-mail? Please help!! Thanks so much!?


Dearest Sexy,

I have a proposition for you. I have been thinking about this for many many days now, so I am 100% sure this is something I'd personally like to do.

Remember when we had that misunderstanding about where you would stay after you move to Winston-Salem? I originally stated that only a short-term stay was workable. Well, I thought about it for awhile after that, and decided that it might actually be a good idea to share a household. Let me give you a run-down of the idea I had in mind.

I think you would be a good roommate, when you move to Winston. If you take this offer, you would be in for 1/3 of the expenses (since there would be 3 people here.) This comes out to about $350 a month which includes all current utilities. I would simply ask for that as a flat rate each month. You would have your own room, and Nessa and I would share a room (the bigger of the two, currently my office).

Even though we are involved with each other in an intimate way, I still think looking at this like a practical roommate arrangement is best.

Here are some reasons why I think this will be beneficial. From a compatibility standpoint we are both quiet people, have similar sleep patterns, value clean and tidy housekeeping, are frugal, don't watch TV much, and have mutual respect. This arrangement stands to help us both financially; I could pay off debt and afford online college. I'm sure you could do something special with the extra cash, whether it be saving up, investing, helping your mom, going back to school, or anything your heart desires.

Domestic tasks would also be simpler if we break it into roles we both enjoy. I could make dinner most nights, and you could take care of most of the yard work. Food expenses could be casually shared & we could benefit from buying in bulk. Cleaning house is something we already do in our current homes; I feel assured you are the type to clean up after yourself even with a woman in the house.

It's important to note that due to work, travel, and school, we would still not have a lot of time to see each other even if we lived together. I would be busy once I got home, and we might be seeing each other only at dinner.

You would have time to yourself probably every week since you get mostly weekdays off. I would still visit my family every other weekend. But, we could go on dates/"sleepovers" just as usual when Nessa is away (Wednesdays and every other weekend). Except, there would be no 2 1/2 hour drive to worry about.

The things that might pose problems are as follows. We could not probably have 3 cats here. Also, there may not be enough room for all your furnishings. These are two things we will have to work on if you take this offer.

You will also have to decide if you are prepared to live in a home with a 7-year old. Some days are fun, but some days are annoying. You would not be expected to take on a parental role. However, because Nessa admires you she will probably seek your attention sometimes. She is talkative and asks lots of questions, and wants to be included in things. Every so often she might pitch a fit over something that seems irrational and it is a very unpleasurable thing to witness. You are a good role model, and this is also a benefit to me & Nessa. But, you have to consider whether this is a benefit to you. Think about whether being a male role model is a rewarding experience to your heart, or if it doesn't really do anything for you. Remember it is normal to get disgusted by children, especially when they are not your own. Just recognize whether you are willing/able to cope with such feelings from time to time.

Anyways, I plan to get rid of some more junk if you decide to make this move. That way we won't be so crowded. I do think there is plenty of room for the three of us, as long as we stay reasonably organized and avoid excess. Neatness will be important.

If you'd like to do this, let me know. You do not have to give an immediate answer; just think about it. Please read at least twice before making a decision.

I hope you have a deliciously wonderful day!

Yours always,

Pumpkin

Interesting e-mail! Certainly sounds...ah......business like.

The actual arrangements would suit most, but the question is less about her & more about you.....

What are you really hoping to get out of moving in?

I suspect you may hope she'll become closer to to you than at present & I think that's on her mind too.

I'm guessing Nessa is her child so think about how she'll be affected if things turn sour, she deserves to be happy.

Chill & I hope it works out whatever way it goes.

you for real ??????????????

Well, its exactly what it says it is..a proposition.
Im guessing that Nessa is her daughter..She was pretty thourough, the rest is up to you...

She really thinks things through, I guess that could be a good trait but imho unmarried people should not cohabitate, especially not in the presence of a child. That is one area in which I question her judgement, exposing her child to an unrelated man in the intimacy of the home.

If you are going to make the move, get your own place, however humble. If you like her, continue to "keep company" but don't live together without marriage and even if you do get married, do not exercise discipline over the child.

well, your Pumpkin sounds like a wise woman..

TOO MANY people move in together, Never having discussed- ANY Details whatsoever.
Should you decide to move in, there should be no surprises!

Good Luck!

Please do not try to test our patience.

Dude, you should go for it. She covered everything, no surprises...If you don't, I will!!

well...do you WANT to live with her??...an easy way would be to list the pros and cons and then decide from that

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