This is an oldie, but for those of you who might not have seen it,
here it
> is.
>
> Corporate Lesson 1:
>
> A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up her
> shower, when the doorbell rings. The wife quickly wraps herself in
> a towel and runs downstairs. When she opens the door, there
> stands Bob, the next-door neighbour. Before she says a word, Bob
>
> says, "I'll give you $800 to drop that towel,"
> After thinking for a moment, the woman drops her towel and stands
> naked in front of Bob. After a few seconds, Bob hands her $800
>
> dollars and leaves. The woman wraps back up in the towel and
> goes back upstairs. When she gets to the bathroom, her husband
> asks, "Who was that?"
>
>
>
>
> "It was Bob the next door neighbour," she replies.
> "Great!" the husband says, "did he say anything about the $800 he
> owes me?"
> Moral of the story: If you share critical information pertaining to
> credit and risk with your shareholders in time, you may be in a
position
> to prevent avoidable exposure.
>
>
> Corporate Lesson 2:
> A priest offered a lift to a Nun.
>
>
> She got in and crossed her legs, forcing her gown to reveal a leg.
> The priest nearly had an accident. After controlling the car, he
> stealthily slid his hand up her leg. The nun said, "Father, remember
>
> Psalm 129?" The priest removed his hand. But, changing gears,
> he let his hand slide up her leg again. The nun once again said,
>
> "Father, remember Psalm 129?" The priest apologized "Sorry sister
>
> but the flesh is weak." Arriving at the convent, the nun went on
>
>
> her way. On his arrival at the church, the priest rushed to look
>
> up Psalm 129. It said, "Go forth and seek, further up, you will
>
> find glory."
>
>
> Moral of the story: If you are not well informed in your job, you
>
> might miss a great opportunity.
>
> Corporate Lesson 3:
>
> A sales rep, an administration clerk, and the manager are
> walking to lunch when they find an antique oil lamp. They rub it
>
> and a Genie comes out. The Genie says, "I'll give each of you
> just one wish." "Me first! Me first!" says the admin clerk. "I want
>
>
> to be in the Bahamas, driving a speedboat, without a ca re in the
> world." Poof! She's gone. "Me next! Me next!" says the sales rep.
> "I want to be in Hawaii, relaxing on the beach with my personal
>
> masseuse, an endless supply of Pina Coladas and
>
>
> the love of my life." Poof! He's gone.
>
> "OK, you're up," the Genie says to the manager.
>
> The manager says, "I want those two back in the office
>
> after lunch."
>
>
>
>
>
> Moral of the story: Always let your boss have the first say.
> Corporate Lesson 4:
>
> A crow was sitting on a tree, doing nothing all d ay. A rabbit
>
> asked him, "Can I also sit like you and do nothing all daylong?"
> The crow answered: "Sure, why not."
>
>
>
> So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the crow, and rested.
> A fox jumped on the rabbit and ate it.
> Moral of the story: To be sitting and doing nothing, you must
> Be sitting very high up.
>
>
> Corporate Lesson 5:
>
>
>
>
> A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love to be able to
> get to the top of that tree," sighed the turkey, but I haven't
> got the energy." "Well, why don't you nibble on my
>
> droppings?" replied the bull. "They're packed with nutrients."
>
> The turkey pecked at a lump of dung and found that it gave him
> enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree. The next
> day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch.
>
> Finally after a fourth night, there he was proudly perched at the
> top of the tree.
> Soon he was spotted by a farmer, who shot the turkey out of
> the tree.
>
> Moral of the story: Bullsh*t might get you to the top, but it
> won't keep you there!!
> now that's good. thank you for that. |
