A lot of people hate the thought of ageing do you.?

> I feel like my body has gotten totally out of shape, so I got my
> > doctor's permission to join a fitness club and start exercising.
> > Idecided to take an aerobics class for seniors. I bent, twisted,
> > gyrated, jumped up anddown, and perspired for an hour. But, by the time
I
> > got my leotards on, the classwas over.
> > ----------------------------------------...
> > Reporters interviewing a 104-year-old woman: "And what do you think is
> the
> > best thing about being 104?" the reporter asked. She simply
> > replied, "No peer pressure,"
> > ----------------------------------------...
> > The nice thing about being senile is you can hide your own Easter eggs.
> > ----------------------------------------...
> > Just before the funeral services, the undertaker came up to the very
> > elderly widow and asked, "How old was your husband?" "98," she replied.
> > "Twoyears older than me." "So you're 96," the undertaker commented. She
> > responded, "Hardly worth going home, is it?"
> > ----------------------------------------...
> > I've sure gotten old. I've had two bypass surgeries, a hip replacement,
> > new knees. Fought prostate cancer and diabetes. I'm half blind, can't
> > hear anything quieter than a jet engine, take 40 different medications
> that
> > make me dizzy, winded, and subject to blackouts. Have bouts with
> > dementia. Have poor circulation, hardly feel my hands and feet anymore.
> > Can't remember if I'm 85 or 92. Have lost all my friends. But, thank
> > God, I still have my driver's license!
> > ----------------------------------------...
> > A 97-year-old man goes into his doctor's office and says, "Doc, I want
> > my sex drive lowered." "Sir," replied the doctor, "you're 97. Don't you
> > think your sex drive is all in your head?" "You're damned right it is!"
> > replied the old man. "That's why I want it lowered!"
> > ----------------------------------------...
> > An elderly woman from Brooklyn decided to prepare her will and make her
> > final requests. She told her rabbi she had two final requests. First,
> > she wanted to be cremated, and second, she wanted her ashes scattered
> > over Bloomingdale's. "Bloomingdale's?" the rabbi exclaimed. "Why
> > Bloomingdale's?" "Then I'll be sure my daughters visit me twice a week

Cute!! Now I'm off to bed.. chuckling all the way!

Haven't you only had about 3 hours sleep Suzie?

Like the driver's license one.

Suzie - I am still laughing (tears running down cheeks) and I think I might have 'spilled' something! Thanks for the really good laughs! I wish I could give you more than one star.
CJ

no i do not.just dieing

Love the jokes.

I don't want to get older because I might not have as much fun older. Once people pair off there is less time with friends. And people that look older are discriminated against.

Boy I needed that!
Thank you, thank you, thank you.

It beats the alternative.

I don't

Yes!! ROFLMBO!!!!

It's not the years passing that I hate, it's the body parts wearing out that I don't like. Whoever said they were aging
gracefully, didn't have health trouble. She probably still had
good knees too (sigh). I used to say I'd go downhill clawing
and scraping every step of the way. But that isn't the case
at all. I really don't mind the aging. At least, not on the outside.
It's the inside, I'm really starting to worry about. There's been
too many things breaking down, so I'm treading water now.
I wish someone would throw me a life preserver!

yes i hate thinking about it

No - now you have gone too far Suzie!

You promised you would never mention that incident at the gym and the leotard issue!

Lovely to see you bounce back - mind you - with a bum the size of yours............of course you would bounce!

lorra love
Izzu

It's not an unknown factor just waiting to be discovered
You know when you have arrived at the "superfluous to requirements" stage. Nobody asks you to do odd jobs, or run errands, and almost like switching a tap off, the ladies stop smiling or even looking.

THANK YOU!!!

No its a part of life and an indicator that each of us has a time line or life expectancy. Sooner or later everyone's number is up. All the more reason to plan ahead for the life beyond the grave, by making Jesus your closest friend.

The Easter eggs..........true for me.lol

i love idea of it @ the mo

some good ones in there

Jokes are nice to wake up to. Thanks for the laughter. I like the Bloomingdales best.

I think this is your best one yet....I saw a bumper sticker on an elderly lady's car, that said....."If you don't like my driving, stay off the sidewalk !!!".......

I LOVE THOSE SUZIE !! Still cackling.....LOL

Ain't to much I can do about it.

The only thing I have noticed is that the canvassers leave me alone now.

I reckon I don't qualify for 'life insurance' any more. Cost 'em too much.

Love your jokes.