i just got some pepers from my lawyer to fill out, wher i have to list income, and expenses.
Of course there's a section for rent/mortgage, utilities, food, auto, loans .. and so on and so forth.
Well, after paying $400/week in child care, and $437 in a car payment, I'm left with $46/month to spend on gas, gorceries, diapers .... it costs $60 for one tank of gas in my car. Therefore, i am FORCED at the moment to live with my mother as I am not getting ANY child support!
If i'm supposed to list current expenses, i'm not going to get enough in child support to be able to live on my own. Am I supposed to list what i CURRENTLY at this VERY second have, or what it was when I was living at home 6 weeks ago?
I'm so confused, my laywer's office is closed for the day, and i'm scared i'm going to get screwed out of the child support I need to BARELY survive!! i have to turn these papers in BEFORE the jusge will een take the case to determine child support ... Been there , done that!! I was in the same situation. I was told to put the expenses that I will be paying as soon as I move out on my own again, so that is what I did. Just put what a reasonable amount for rent/mortgage payment in your area,utilities,etc. I know it is frustrating but hang in there.It really does get better. It just takes some time. It has been a little over a year for me & I still struggle but it IS getting better!! : 0 ) tell them that youre only living with your mom temporaly, so I would give the numbers of when i lived alone Child support is determined in some states only by what the father makes. Other states it is between the mom's income and dad's income.
You should not look to child support to completely support the child. You have to kick in your share as well....which I'm pretty certain you will - as children are expensive! :)
Some states require the father to help with daycare as well - others don't.
I believe you are supposed to put what you currently have at this moment. He is still suppose to be paying his part. This would have been ordered at your temporary hearing. Speak to your attorney and let him know your husband is not helping and you can't make it without some help from the courts. I personally would put what it costs you to live on your own. If they question it then tell in detail. Tell them the ONLY reason you are living with your mom right now is because you are the sole provider for the child and unable to afford your own apt because you are having to pay for EVERYTHING the child needs by YOURSELF!! Don 't worry, just be honest and do the best you can. You are entitled to get child support and it all depends on both incomes to determine how much money you will get. Don't worry about the spelling I understood what you was saying. Good Luck to you and everything is going to be alright. first: dont lie on the papers u r filling out. $400/wk in child care seems high. i dont know how many children you have so its hard to say.
Car payment: $437.00 car needs to go. you cant afford it. you must live on rice and beans, beans and rice.
Child support is not for you to live its for support for your children. You must still be able to maintain a job and obtain an income. Not working or working at a job which doesnt pay well will not increase your child support amount. it is based on a scale. Your wages compared to his. It will determine the percentage of monies you guys collected as a unit and if he made more than you he will be responsible for that percentage of the medical bills, and that percentage of what it actually takes to raise your children. These things are totally seperate from each other so what this means he will be paying a percentage of all your medical etc, plus child support. This doesnt include credit card debt, loans, auto payments, or high rent or mortgage.
Suggestions there. Housing market sucks so you should be able to find a less expensive place to buy or rent. It is a buyers market.
Credit card debts: There is many ways to roll all your debt into interest free cards. I do it all the time. Its like musical chairs. dont recommend it, but desperate times call for desperate measures.
Auto: As said earlier, get a cheaper car. you cant afford the 1989 car you may be driving now. sorry but its true.
Loans: consolidate...If dont have great credit ask your mother to co-sign. Shes letting you live with her, she will do the other as well if she has decent credit and you are serious about doing this you wont have a problem.
Screwed out of child support: Please dont forget this isnt about you. dont EVER forget that. Its about the kids.
Finally, any subhuman that doesnt support the children he helped to create is a sorry S.O.B. and should be punished legally. I hope you have a good lawyer. But child support issues always fall in favor of the mother. Also, you ever thought about joint custody? He gets 50% of the time you get the other 50%
Your money out of your pocket would go down 50%
Its a scary time right now I know. But talk to your lawyer and have the child support people grab him by the balls
Good luck Honey You should list all your expenses honestly as they are at the moment. There should be a section where you list debts & you can add up what food/power/etc is costing your Mom & list it as a loan that has to be paid back.
The Judge will be able to tell you are living beyond your means & should be more lenient with child support.
Your ex. should pay half of the child care. HB,
you have some terrific advice above me by Wee Willie and Annie. Follow Annie's advice on listing the expenses, ALL of them, Wee Willie and some other person were correct that you may have to find a cheaper car; however, you will also need that car for work. Wee Willie gave good advice on whether your Mom has good credit could benefit you, I know these things aren't easy to ask BUT YOUR DAUGHTER NEEDS YOUR BEST AT THIS VERY MOMENT.
List all expenses as the CURRENTLY ARE, this also includes your income. At some point in the near future you can and may be able to use the child support to fund your daughters future college education, for now you need to be able to live and eat. There is a WIC program (Women, Infant, Children) that you can apply for that will allow you to get additional food until your daughter is 5 years old - FREE MILK (as you know the most important staple her little body needs at this point), among other important foods like rice, peanut butter, cereal, juice - things that will help you not have to worry about. Once you get into the groove it will be easy for you (to pick up the food-any questions email me off line).
Lastly, and most important - you need to keep your chin up, your head high, and your focus on getting every red cent out of the bum that left you. YOU DID NOTHING WRONG, you are a decent young mother and now (as you are someone's daughter) your daughter needs her Mom. Do not let your self esteem go down - ask the attorney questions and do not be embarrassed by anything. When you get in front of the judge it will be OK to give an Academy Award performance and cry and tell him that you feel abandoned, every word out of your mouth at that juncture will be worth $$$$.
Take Care. give a bj 2 lawyer. everything will be fixed. |
