What would you do?-single unemployed mom-if i get a job,the baby sitter= 800$,that would be my entire paycheck

So my sons father left me before our son was born, I was having complications with my pregnancy and was forced to quit my job and move up to my mothers. She tried to tell me that i should lie to the welfare office, to tell them i didn't know who the father was so that in the future, he wouldn't be able to claim custody. she adopted my first son and wanted to adopt this one too.

she had never asked me to lie before, somthing was very wrong, her and i argued for weeks, she said I had to do this because i had nowhere to go. she was right, i was stubborn and told her that i had lots of places to go, so she said "your father and i think you should go then".
so they dropped a 5 month pregnant me off, back in downtown portland. i really didn't have anywhere to go. one night i slept in a friends car, i couch surfed for a few weeks, than i ended up staying with this guy. we fight and i want to leave but i know that my entire check would go to paying a sitter, non left for food, rent ect.

i forgot to say it's been 4 years now, i've had a few jobs but can't get enough hours to pay both rent and the sitter. my sons father is paying child-support but it's only 200$ a month, he wanted me to have an abortion so he not willingly paying, it's being garnished.

Oregon won't help pay for childcare once i have a job. ( strange, i know.)

this is how so many single moms end up abused and dead, being stuck in this system. i wonder how many pregnant women see people in my situation, they just have the abortion because if they keep it, it means they'll be screwed till that kid gets into school. thank god for public school.



oh, and lord KNOWS i'd get my tubes tied if i had the $ :)

Give the children up for adoption so they have a chance at a good life. It doesn't sound like you are capable of providing for them. People really need to be more responsible before they bring children into the world...

Man, you are a piece of work. The fathers of both kids should be paying child support. Your parents are idiots too, but right to kick you out. May I suggest getting your tubes tied????

contact an agency in your area. Try through planned parenthood or a similar agency. A social worker will be able to give you some of the options available to you.

Sounds rough, it makes even more grateful for what I have.

Look a childcare assistance program where the state will pay for your childcare. You might aslo be able to find another single mother like yourself who would swap services for room and board or something like that.

Good luck to you and your uunborn baby.

Go home and ask for forgiveness. Then, find the father of your child and give him an ultimatum. Give me "$" per month, or i will hunt you down like a dog and break your neck! If that doesn't work, talk to a social worker. They can help you get on your feet. Plus, the father is responsible to pay child support, which may help. Most of all, get an education. You will make much more money, thus you will have a chance at a better life. There are people out there that care, you just need to find them and let them help you help yourself! Good luck and God Bless!

Yep.
How soon will you have another baby?

Move to France. You get free daycare, health care, and a much larger pay check. It would also be paid for by the rich assholes who can't empathize, and have apparently never had problems in their life.

The U.S. welfare system will screw you from the start, as it has been demonized by so many politicians and idiots who buy into this "American dream" nonsense. I would try lying again to welfare, you might get somewhere. Pestering them is the only way to get anything.

Your parents are assholes. Typical to shelter someone with blinding religious dogma, and then be surprised and hoist the blame on you completely when a kid comes about. Thanks christian america ;P.

You need to go to social services for help. Given how much money we give to illegals, as a citizens maybe you can get help after they have all been fed. I hope.

You made your mistakes, now lets see how we can help.
It does happen that sometimes, it doesn't pay if you get off welfare, and I'm assuming you are on it, if not, contact the social services office and get on it if you can, at least you can get some housing help. It goes without saying that another pregnancy would be disastrous for both you and your baby.
So make a trip to the doctor one of the first things on your list when you get on medicaid.
Its hard to tell you what to do until this gets worked out, working right now may not be an option, but social services may help you find a day care situation you can afford.
A child born to a single mother has a 47% chance of living in poverty for its whole life, if you want to change it you have to change your whole attitude, and thats not easy, you need education and a job, and you may need to make up to your parents so you can do that. Its never easy to admit you were wrong, but you now know you were, I'm betting, as a mother myself, she will take you back, this time try harder, couch surfing is bad enough for you, ask yourself if thats what you want to offer your child.

DANGER! WILL ROBINSON!

There are a few discrepancies and contradictions in you story. Which makes me believe that this is a put on.

I know, I was a single mom too with no help from my sons dad. I will be honest. I think you should start a home based business. I started making beaded neclaces at home and made a great living. When you are just getting started it can be a cash business until you are making a profit. I know alot of moms that babysit, worked for Tupperware,sold makeup with Avon. Really you have to make it happen for yourself. Sell on ebay. It is tough but this is America and you can make money lots of ways.