How to deal with my husband depression because he got under a lot of pressure and stress at the office ?

Two years ago my husband decided to work with his cousin. And he knew that his cousin's company is very stress out, not organize and has a very bad environment since his cousins loves to scream and yelling at their employee and using bad words around the office. His cousins show no appreciation whatsoever to their employee and treat them like slaves. Now the stress is getting worst and worst and the pressure getting so bad and somehow my husband take it out on me. It has been 6 months now, I still trying to be good wife for him, giving him a lots of time for himself so he can relax (he play games on the weekdays and weekend, all the times), giving him massages, comforting him, but none of them is working, as a matter a fact, he ask me to give him space and he doesn't want me to said anything about what he about to do with himself or the money that we have. We have 4 years old together and he has a 17 years old from his previous marriage. Any suggestion ??

Unfortunately working w/relatives is NOT a good idea. I've seen more problems w/family orientated business which w/that fact alone puts stress on people. His cousin's whole workplace sounds like one of caios period. It's a wonder he even can keep employees let alone a partner! Certainly not one where you would look forward to getting up & going in to work every day on a daily basis. I gather from what you said, he's asking the two of you to break up & give him space. That is not going to do any good whatsoever. It is not going alieviate his stress at the workplace. You've sure done everything in your power to make things as less stressful as possible from what you said. I honestly would suggest he do something about the caiotic work place situation. That's where the problem lies, not w/you. Until he gets that resolved, there aren't going to be any changes that would involve you. I think he should go see his Dr. & see if maybe he can get some medication for the stress problem I had the same stress problems for different reasons, but still the same situation stemmed from stress. There are lots of medications available that would be of great help to him. Stress can do soooo many things to a person. It could lead to health sitiations that are serious & harmful & shouldn't be taken lightly. Before you make the move to break up a family because of it, I would STRONGLY suggest he seek professional help & get on a medication that would help greatly. Secondly, if he can, do something about the job situation. It sure isn't worth having a heart attack, stroke or anything of that nature because of a job situation. See if maybe he would just be willing to go see his Dr. first before he does anything, especially breaking up his family. I know I feel 100% better now that I'm on a medication that I needed so badly. I certainly do wish you all the best, but he has to do something about it or it could to kill him then no one would have him!!! This is a serious condition, have him do something about it ASAP... Especially since I KNOW for SURE it can be treatable.

Whew. I went through this a few years ago myself. I
almost left my husband but hung in there. Things did
get better and the Boss that harrassed him got fired.
He would yell at me sometimes for no reason but
most of the time he just moped around the house
and didn't want to do anything on his days off. I
suggested a therapist but he said no.
The best thing for me was talking to my friends about
it. (even though most of them are not in the state I live
in now, I called them everyday or emailed.) My friends
got me through. Best Wishes.

It is HIS responsibility to work through this... to make a decision about this.
"as a matter a fact, he ask me to give him space and he doesn't want me to said anything about what he about to do with himself or the money that we have" Now the money is a concern of yours, but how he deals with this job and the stress is his responsibility. Give him space and if he is lashing out at you... Back up even more... he has no right take it out on you... he has a responsibility to resolve it. It may feel demeaning to him that you are taking responsibility for his stress, moods, anger, frustration, and decision-making. He is an adult, isn't he?

His depression and stress is his problem, not yours. It probably is not anything new in his life (hmmm wonder why he divorced the first time). Don't be surprised he dumps you as your child enters kindergarten, many men feel they are free to leave then because the kid is not a baby anymore.

My suggestion is to get a job and prepare for the future. Give him his space. However do keep an eye on the money and start stashing some away yourself.

I think u both of u should go and see a counsilor before things gets worse than it sounds. In the mean time just be patient and pray about the situation. God will see u through. All the best.

Why is everyone telling you this is HIS problem?? You are his wife; of course it's your problem too.

I would encourage him to get some help or antidepressants or something. This is very treatable.

Sometimes space is not the answer...Try doing special things for him that show him how much you care and appreciate him. He will come around. Make sure that these things do not cause more stress. Perhaps also show some interest in what he is doing, including the video games (i know that is not what you really want to do, but you may be suprised with the results.) Also, find a way to take him away from the stress for a weekend. Go for a mini vacation, or go for a day to the hills/beach/lake wherever. Just so he is away from the environment.