Can a boss do this? Is sticking up for myself insubordination?

My boss expects employees to have no boundaries between work and personal life. She has asked me to call during vacations and time off(no on call responsibilities), clean the toilet (since she picked a house as our office space;other agency staff work out of an office inside a hotel), and recently she assumed it was ok for me to take things from our office to another in my personal car without asking if I had enough room to do so. She speaks for me when we are dealing with collaterals and introduces me as her staff,not by name or position. She diagnoses staff as being mentally ill and told another staff member her diagnosis for me. I confronted her via e-mail (to have proof of what I said) after I tried unsuccessfuly to do in person and sent confidential copy to her boss(We have an open door policy). Can she do what she is doing and is it insubordinate for me to stick up for myself as a person?

She does not treat just me this way. She made my co-worker cry my first week on the job and I 've been told by other people in the office, that do not work under her, that the agency has two pending law suits from former employees working under my boss.

Well what is your job description? I am sure it doesn't say that you have to work during your vacation. It is also inappropriate for a boss to call you mentally ill and even if she thinks this privately, it is not ok for her to tell other employees.
It sounds like you have a bad boss. Going to her higher ups is a good idea but if this doesn't improve the situation, it would probably be best to look for a new job where you are treated with respect.

to me, as long as you handled it in a professional manner,, such as writing the email,,,,,,,, and if you explained the problem,,,,, in a non-vulgar way,,,,,,, then it is not insubordination, it is exactly what you are suppose to do in this situation

Every employee is protected by the Working Time Directive and you can stick to your working hours as laid out in your contract. You are entitled to breaks and holidays by law and should not be asked to call when you are off.
If your company has a grievance procedure follow it and/or involve the union.

I would suggest that you, too, develop an "open-door" policy. And walk through it. Don't slam it too hard on your way out.

Line up a job in a healthier environment pronto.

Some of what she is asking may be acceptable, depending on your position in the organization--cleaning the bathroom, for example, no matter how distasteful. Asking you to use your personal vehicle for business errands is really quite normal, as long as you are reimbursed for the auto expense. Asking you to call in on time off may be normal, depending on your position, but most employers try to avoid this. You could suggest that she get you a Blackberry or similar so you could easily access your email to avoid having to call in.

She is clearly disrespectful to you and that is not acceptable in business anymore. And, her speaking of you as mentally ill to other employees is despicable.

If your company has an open door policy, and/or an HR department, take your issues either up the line or to HR, assuming you've tried to address them with her. Speaking up for yourself--for example, introduce yourself when she simply calls you "staff," and telling her flat out what you expect and need--will help you when you report her to senior management. If you've not told her, senior management may send you back to try to resolve the issue yourself.

Stick to your guns, tell her you will not call while on your personal time. As far as can she get away with doing what she has been doing, yes....as long as you allow her to do it. You've committed no insubordination that I can see. Personally, i'd tell her to get bent (i'd say much worse :)) ). No job is worth your self-esteem. Send a letter of resignation to her boss explaining why you are quitting and her boss may actually do something about it.

Yes, your boss can do this. The question is, are you going to put up with it? I would recommend having clear and firm boundaries with your boss. Your boss will either respect you for this or fire you. But, if you get fired, your probably better off anyway. Go someplace where you are treated well.