A slice of buttered bread, when dropped, will always land butter-
side down.
When you need an item that is in a heap, it will always be the one
at the bottom.
Buses take ages to arrive, but when they do they always arrive in
sets of three (in Britain "you wait ages for a bus, then two come
along at once!"). There actually is a logical explanation for this:
the first bus is slowed down because of the time needed to let
passengers get on and off. The subsequent busses are (typically) not
allowed to pass the first bus, so you tend to end up with a full bus
followed by a line of empty ones.
The day you forget your umbrella, it pours with rain.
When graphing, the graph paper is always one square too small for
the perfect scale
When caught in a traffic jam, the lane that you are in will always
be the slowest to move. (This joke was played out in the opening
sequence of the film Office Space, where one of the main characters
changed lanes multiple times, all in vain as the traffic around him
moved.) This also has a logical explanation. In general, the lane
with the fewest cars in it is most likely to move the fastest.
Therefore, since you're statistically more likely to be one of the
members of the lane with the most cars, your lane will more often
than not be the slow one.
Nothing is as easy as it looks.
Everything takes longer than you think. Or, everything takes twice
as long as it should; excepting that which appears easy, taking
three times as long.
Anything that can go wrong will go wrong, and at the worst possible
time.
If there is a possibility of several things going wrong, the one
that will cause the most damage will be the one to go wrong.
If something simply cannot go wrong, it will anyway.
If you perceive that there are four possible ways in which a
procedure can go wrong, and circumvent these, then a fifth way,
unprepared for, will promptly develop.
Left to themselves, things tend to go from bad to worse.
If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked
something.
Nature always sides with the hidden flaw.
It is impossible to make anything foolproof because fools are so
ingenious.
Whenever you set out to do something, something else must be done
first.
Every solution breeds new problems.
Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.
A Smith & Wesson beats four aces.
Junk will grow to fill the available cupboard space.
All small objects of value will disappear when set down.
Magellan's Allegory: If you stop and ask someone for directions, and
they tell you "You can't miss it"... then be assured that you will.
If you make it idiot-proof, someone will make a better idiot.
The light at the end of the tunnel is that of an oncoming train.
When you put your pants on without looking 鈥?they will always be on
backwards.
A series of events will go wrong in the most negative sequence.
Airline Travel Variation: The time you have to catch a flight is
inversely proportional to the distance to the gate.
50/50/90-If there is a 50/50 chance to get it right, there is a 90%
chance that you will get it wrong.
Nothing ever gets built to budget or to deadline (also known as
Cheop's Law).
Good/Fast/Cheap - If you need something good fast, it won't be
cheap. If you need something cheap fast, it won't be good. If you
need something good cheap, it won't be fast. "If you make it idiot-proof, someone will make a better idiot." --lol
"there are no such things as stupid questions, just a lot of inquisitive idiots."- ;) mythbusters proved the buttere bread thing wrong it is totally random This is bascially murphys law as well. lol this is true most of the time... ur wasting time lol :) Isn't it ironic? Man! You like to type don't you! lol what u wrote is true almost every time, its part of life otherwise life would just be boring but this makes you think lol true... The toast always lands butter side down, EXCEPT when it is strapped onto the back of a cat! Cats always land on their feet, EXCEPT when buttered toast is strapped onto their backs!
So when you release a buttered-cat pair (to use the standard abbreviation) it will BEGIN to fall down, but then turn rapidly over and over in mid air and never actually hit the floor. This forms the basis of the Perpetual Motion power source, which derives its power from a series of such buttered-cats.
(Until the cat dies, then the toast just hits the floor and stays there, and the buttered-cat pair must be replaced; or until the butter flies of from centipetal acceleration and then the cat is slammed to the floor at many times its original speed, breaking its legs, and the buttered-cat pair must be replaced.)
Try it for yourself. Simply strap buttered toast to a cat's back, attach a pulley to the cat, with a belt taking off power to run an electrical generator. Presto! you now have an infinitely regenerating power source! Congratulations on your independence (you wondered how I was going to work in Independence Day greetings, didn't you?) from the electrical grid!
PS No buttered toast was harmed in the making of this Answer! |
