I am not married and my coworker...?

My co-worker and I share office space. She's a really nice lady and we get along great, except for one thing that really bothers me. I am not married and I am living with my son's father. She's very religious, which I respect and I am happy for her. But there's been many times that she askes me when I am going to get married. For my bday she even said "If you were married, i would have given you a gift for both of you too enjoy, but since you are not, i dont want to enforce you guys to do something illegal". In other convesatiions w/ other co-workers she indirectly states how been unmarried is bad and that she wouldn't have sexual relationships until she gets married. i understand her point of view, but i am getting tired of her bugging me of when I am going to get married!! I am 26 yrs old. I am a really quiet person and I am usually afraid to be outspoken w/ anyone at work.

Hi everyone, I am very happy for your responses, they are all very good. Today she asked me again, and I told her that when we get married I would let her know. She kept on asking me for a reason of why i don't get married right now> I got really irritated, and I told her again that when I do, she would know. Then she said that GOd has blessed my relationship and she didnt want us to take that afor granted. It was very annoying how she kept on insisting, like it was her life. I should have kpet my mouth shut and never shared anything w/ her!! ugh

Well there is a first time for everthing! You need to speak up for yourself!! Tell her your personal life is none of her buisness and you would appreciate it if she kept her opinions to herself!!!
Good Luck!

ignore her she might just be jealous of u

You tell her that you just haven't found the right person yet.

Also, Jesus was unmarried. Is it OK for a man to be unmarried and not for a woman?

Screw her !!!!
Do what ever YOU want and enjoy yourself !!! WINK

Have a polite chat to her then if this does not work then move office space. You are entitled to live how you do and she to her religion however this criticism of your lack of matrimony is HARRASSMENT, ther should be people in your office who deal with this or maybe you have a union you can approach.

It's YOUR life, and YOUR business! Live your life, and let her live hers! Would you agree with everything she does? NO, (meddling in your business, etc.). Be nice, but firm with her, and don't let her upset you! Good Luck!!

She is placing moral judgement ahead of friendship with you. I dont think anyone should judge. But on the other hand why is it bothering you? You choose to live that way. Perhaps your problem is that you feel you should be married.
I dont know if that helps but I know to have a good family life you need to have committment from all parties. Otherwise you are just playing acting a real family.

Good Luck and God Bless!!

Well, I would talk to her and tell her that her bugging you about being unmarried is bothering you and that you don't like to keep hearing about it. As her why she is so concerned about YOU getting married. She just might realize that she's going to far with it. Either that or she likes you but is so religious that she is trying to ignore her feelings by denying it and coming up with these things.

just try to tell her tht wen ms. right comes i will welcome her! in a funny nice way tht she wouldnt ask u again!

Tell her it is none of her business.

Tell her about ur feelings

Next time she does it quietly ask her: Jesus loved Mary Magdalene, do you think he'll reject me???

You could try to ignore her when she mentions about marriage...it is fine that she has her beliefs, but no one should place their beliefs on another who does not share the same viewpoints.

If you find that you cannot ignore her, you may have to become assertive and speak up and ask her politely not to mention marriage to you anymore.
You can say that you don't wish to discuss this marriage subject with her because you feel it is a personal thing and it has nothing to do with your job performance - or who and what you are as a person.

If she is truly respectful towards you, then she will understand your wishes. If she is not respectful and insists on mentioning marriage to you, then you may have to ask your boss to move you to another location in the office - if that is possible.

Good Luck!

It's your life so live it how you want! She needs to be more open minded and accept that you have different views to her and have chosen to live your life differently. You need to discuss this with her and point out that not everyone is the same as her!

Its never going to go away unless you address it; I realize that sounds really difficult to do (trust me, I hate confrontation as well), but it sounds like an uncomfortable situation is escalating into a hostile one. The next time she mentions something, tell her you respect her opinions and but that you are happy in your relationship as it is. Make sure she understands that it has nothing to do with her as a person; she probably doesn't realize she is hurting your feelings and is just trying to witness to you. Once you tell her, she may feel really badly about it; even if she doesn't, you can feel good because you have been honest and open with yourself and with her.

it is harassment. ask her nicely to stop making the comments to you and to other co-workers about you not being married. you respect her beliefs but she should respect your to. and if it doesn't stop got to your boss. you should be allowed to work without pressure from a co-worker. good luck

Time for this lady to join the rest of us in the 21st century. You are doing the same thing that millions of other people are doing right now. She is in the wrong by saying anything to at all. I would just tell her that you are going to get married, but you want to save up alot of money so that you can make it a really big celebration. Its going to take a while, but when the day comes she will get the invitation.

i'am just like u not very out spoken i think u should just tell her that is you're choice and when u are good and ready to get married u will let her know and even invite her but for now she should drop the subject or u will have to ignore her or maybe ask the boss to move u somewhere else so that she don't keep bothering u, at 26 u are in title to do what u feel is right and when u know that u are w/ the right person and u want to make him ur husband because u know is the right thing to do u will then fill it in your heart and do the right think, good luck to u. i know is hard to avoid people like that because u just don't want to hurt there feelings but just be nice and tell her how u feel.

You could tell her to mind her own business. What works for some may not work for all. Rushing into a marriage b/c of a child could create big problems, so waiting is the best idea. This lady needs to keep her comments to herself, as she is obviously creating a hostile work environment. I have a feeling that if you did get married, she would find something else to complain about. And for gods sake, telling you that she would give you more presents- who cares?

If you don't have your degree yet, you can receive grants to go to college which will pay 75% of your tuition. All you have to do is claim the child on your taxes (not his). It is all legal and it helps single parents to get different jobs where crazy old ladies don't mind their own business.

Well u need to be outspoken b/c this person is really bugging you. You may need to tell her something or speak to a supervisor b/c she is making u upset and an upset worker doesn't do a good job. And if your productivity at work is affected then that may result in termination, so just think about the bigger picture. You need to tell her that this is your life and you do not need her to be dictating it for you. Think about it, if you go off and get married you will be pleasing her and someone like is never satisfied so she is gonna find a fault with u again. you need to make it clear to her that you are there to work and get a paycheck not to hear her antics. Tell her that you respect her believe but you are not interested in what she has to say. Marriage is a life time committment and if you are not ready for that there is no need in you rushing towards it.

you are 26 years old you go to work everyday to take care of yous baby for the i would have sex b4 i get married remark she made tell her its too late you have a beautiful baby abd you would do it all over again you started this by telling her that much so to end it you just kindly say "excuse me I don't mean to sound rude or disrespectful but I told you all that that much about me just in friendly conversation i did not want any feed back from it I love my son and wouldn't give him back for the world I am not ready to be married nor is my sons father that is your reliious belief and I respect that but please don't try to put your religion on me" and leave it there no disrespect be outspoken girl and by the way if she is not married then you know what her problem is she is horny. ask her to stop askind you when you're gonna get married because you don't no at thus time and don't buy you anything at all because you would not want her to go against her religion oh and she might be sinning by talking to you si=o ask her to stop that to Lets See What Happens Good Luck Boo

hey dear r u indian....
please tell me if u r interest to marry some1 who is very thin and com and studing MBA in bangalore university...
cz its me....
manjunatha.R
please contact through my mail:
my email id is:
manjunathraj23@yahoo.co.uk,
manjunathraj23@myway.com
manjunathraj2303@yahoo.co.in.
its...really ur in drageee.....mood com out of that so get some good person who cares u and well being with u a long time.....ok its my suggession if u dont wanna contact me ....
ok bye....
with as a good welwisher...
manjunatha.R

Hi,this coworker of you sounds to me like she can be nasty. Nasty in a way that only you can feel. If you know what I mean?

Talk to her tell her that you respect her religion and that you can also see her point in.But you also need to tell her that you are your own person with your own life to live!!And also she must return that respect for you!!

It is not up to her to judge you or anyone else for that matter.She should live her own life and let you live yours. Enjoy your life and just remember(and tell her if you want to) NOBODY is perfect everybody make mistakes and you know what as long as you can learn out of them and be happy , then it is LIFE!!!!!!!!!!

And in any case a real friend wont tell you something like that on your birthday!!!and when did it become illegal???

Just a question : Does she have a life??

Talk it out with her... May be she is thinking good about you... And use your ears well... one to listen what you want and other one to leave what you dont... so you can do what you want.

U DON'T TELL YOUR BIZ AT WORK
BUT SINCE U DID, TELL HER SHE'S KOOL BUT LEAVE THE MARRIAGE ISSUE ALONE, CUZ IF U DO IT AND YA'LL AIN'T READY OR TOTALLY COMMITTED THEN IT COULD END IN DIVORCE, LET HER KNOW IT OFFENDS U AND IF SHE CAN'T ACCEPT THAT THEN SHE'S TRYING TO CONTROL WHAT U DO