Does my future sis-in-law need to be told about herself?This is crazy!?

My wedding is next weekend in Cali. I am from Texas.My fiancee has a sis in Minnesota who is 32 and has MANY boyfriends. She always cries broke, but buys $140 jeans and expensive liquor. Her parents (my future in-laws) paid her way to the wedding including hotel for 4 nights.She calls my fiance to let him know she plans to bring some dude she just met on my-space to the wedding. The guy is flying in from Vegas and staying the entire weekend. Only 30 guests are invited, just very close friends and family.The price per person is quite high.It's not the price though...it's the fact that she is so bold to say some meathead dude we have never met is coming. What do you all think I should do?

You hope thre is some really good pay-per-view in the room because the my-space boyfriend will not be allowed at the wedding.

You can't stop him from coming in general but you do have a say over if he's at the wedding or not. For me, it's about more than just the extra cost per person (which DOES matter if you are on a budget). You don't know this guy and have no idea how he is going to behave. The last thing you need at your small, intimate family affair is to have some drunk stranger causing a scene. It would be one thing if you were having 300 people with loads of "and guests" but you arent.

I think your fiance should speak to her, and tell her that it's a very small wedding just for family and very close friends, and that you're sorry to disappoint her, but you won't be able to include her new friend.

I would definitely express how you feel. I know that you probably don't want to get on the bad side of your future in-laws, but it is YOUR wedding too after all. I would make sure I talked to my fiance about my feelings. You were very selective about who you invited, why should you have to have someone there who you really don't know.

tell her that you would love to have her at the wedding however, you do not have room for her guest

I say just let it go. One more person isn't going to ruin the wedding or drive the cost so high that it's worth the confrontation with her and the stress of what that will bring. Have your beautiful wedding, go on a fantastic honeymoon, then come home to your wonderful new life. You won't even be living in the same state (or region, for that matter) as your sister-in-law, so just let it go. No one says that you and your husband need to loan her money, and if she ever asks, just say no. Congratulations on the wedding!

I think you should talk to your fiance and tell him how you feel. Hopefully you both can come to an agreement that you and he can deal with. You deffinately don't want a scene to be made at your wedding, so whatever you do decide, make sure you're the person who had more tact in the situation. It is YOUR day not hers. Don't let some meathead squeeze his way in on your wedding on your dollar. It would be different if they had been dating for quite a while, but just some "GUY"......I wouldn't be allowing it myself.

Sadly, telling her what you think will only cause conflicts with your new family and could make your special day go badly. If you upset her now she might gain a grudge against you, which won't make family gatherings very enjoyable. Yeah, the guy probably won't be around for long and yeah, it is an added expense but telling her how you feel will only cause drama and that is NOT what you need in your wedding! Perhaps mention to her that the wedding can't handle anymore people because the expense would be so great and you'd appreciate it if he just toured the city and had fun on his own while the wedding is going on.

Congratulations and I hope you have a good future either way!

I can't even imagine why he would want to come. However it is your wedding and it should be as you want it.
If your husband to be won't speak to her, then just tell her, you are an invited member of the wedding party, your friend will
have to wait it out for you somewhere else. A stranger should feel out of place at a close knit family wedding. Maybe you should speak to him. Happy Wedding and a happy life.

First tell your fiancee, then tell his sister that it is an invitation only wedding. She sounds like she just walks on peoples feelings. She may just be jealous because the attention is not on her.

I would tell her your sorry, but she was invited...not him and there is no place for him at your wedding. if she doesnt like it then thats too bad for her. nobody has the right to start inviting people to your wedding. this coulc be a total weirdo. I would have your fiance explain this to her and if it gets him nowhere then I would personally step in.

Probably best if you talk to your fiance and get him to speak to her. She may not listen to you. But it is really unfair. Family is always a difficult thing to work with and you have to be careful because it can affect everyone. even if she shows up with him dont let it get in the way of your special day.

Oh, my dear kala. I feel your pain. I personally believe the issue is, "How was the invitation addressed to future sis-in-law"? did it say, Miss Sally Brown and guest? or Miss Sally Brown? If it indicated that she can invite a guest, then you cannot be choosy about who her guest is. However, if the invitation was only for her, then you have every right to call her and tell her that the guest list is limited, and you did not intend for her to bring a guest. Certainly the meathead might spend the four days with your future sis, but then, she has the right to have a guest in the room. And, future sis might decide not to attend some of the ceremonies, but so be it, probably you have more fun without her than with her. If you decide to let her bring the meathead to the wedding, then you might just warn your future sis to do a criminal background check on the meathead before she picks him up at the airport. And, suggest they meet a few days before the wedding. The grand relatiohship may likely end before you even make it to wedding day.

This is my opinion, but let her bring him. If this turns out to be the guy she falls in love with, and marries, you'll want your hubby to be allowed to bring you. LOL. Shes going to be your sis. Welcome her like you want her to welcome you. Just try to avoid having her put him in family pictures. My wife has a cousin who has a different boy friend every year. Well shes not that bad, but every christmas we cant show the video or pictures from last christmas cause her last boy friend was there and nobody want to feel awkward.
Remember "The Godfather"?
When Michael brings his new girl friend "Kate" He even grabs her and pulls her into the family pictures.
The Godfather looked at him and decided that it was his decision.
Good luck and congrats.

i totally agree with kate b.. your first answer... she is correct and i couldnt of said it better myself... congrats

Either you and your fiance or your fiance should talk to her. It's your wedding and she needs to be respectful. Just because she's invited doesn't mean she can bring anyone. Tell her you want it to be an intimate family affair and you'd prefer if you can just spend the time with her since you don't really know this man she just met, or technically hasn't even met yet. Even though you said the price isn't the issue, maybe you should mention it...you could always say you didn't tell the caterer that you were going to be having an extra person and they aren't prepared to make that many plates. Either way...talk to her and let her know! She should respect your feelings...remember it's YOUR wedding....make your oppinion known!

This is a good way to test out your husband-wife communication skills. Tell your hubby exactly what you told us and if he can be accomodating to both of you then that would be great.
But remind him it is your day and his day. NOT his sisters day.

And tell him/her that it's probably best if she come alone. Cause who knows, she could meet a cute guy on the plane/wedding, instead of meeting strange guys off of myspace.

I would say no. She can come alone. Or pay for her guy.

Have your fiance speak to her!

She has no right to bring a date to YOUR wedding unless you put: "You may bring a date", which you obviously didn't.

If your fiance talking to her does not work, try your futre in-laws. I'm sure they'll back you and your fiance up. Then try other family(cousins, sisters, other brothers, aunts, uncles). But if she still insists on brining him, YOU talk to her. Explain firmly(everyone has tried to be nice with her before) that you have paid for this wedding and you are not paying for any extra guests!

If worse comes to worse and she shows up at the wedding with the guy, tell her guy AND her to leave. Several people have spoken to her about it and she didn't take the hint.

You don't need to be stressing about this a week before your big day!

Good luck and congrats!

It's the problem of your fiance and his family now. Have him talk to her and to his parents to see what they want her to do. In the end it is their call whether she can bring him or not. Did you allow her a date on the invite? If you did then you are kind of screwed and get ready to meet Mr. Myspace.

Call her right now and tell her that only 30 guests are invited and that her new "boyfriend" is not one of them.

More people need to call the RUDE people on the carpet. Let's all embrace our spines and call a spade a spade.

If you invited just her, she should not invite anyone else, tell your FI to talk to her, and make that clear, you want there poeple you care about and people who care about you, and not some strange person there regardless if it's a bf or not.
On my wedding I am just inviting my friends and family alone unless they are married or engaged, or if I am befriended with both, but I am not paying for some friend of mine to bring his or her latest hookup, NO WAY!!

It might be best for your fiance to be the one to talk to her. Talk to him about how you feel. The wedding is supposed to be an intimate event according to your plans, not with a bunch of close people and some bum that your future sister-in-law hasn't even met in person let alone the whole family. Besides, the wedding is next weekend. Your fiance should tell her that she can't let this guy come. This wedding is an intimate affair and a change of plans now is not acceptable. I wouldn't go off on her about how she says she's broke and then spends hundreds. Don't bring that into it. Right now, just talk to your fiance and hopefully he can talk to his sister about the situation.