I recently read that love is entirely a matter of
chemistry. That must
be why my wife treats me like toxic waste.
- David Bissonette
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When a man steals your wife, there is no better
revenge than to let him
keep her.
- Sacha Guitry
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After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of
a coin; they just
can't face each other, but still they stay together.
-- Hemant Joshi
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By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you'll
be happy. If you get
a bad one, you'll become a philosopher.
-- Socrates
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It's true that all men are born free and equal, but
some of them get
MARRIED!
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A happy marriage is a matter of giving and taking;
the husband gives and
the wife takes.
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Woman inspires us to great things, and prevents us
from achieving them.
-- Dumas
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The great question... which I have not been able to
answer... is, "What
does a woman want?
-- Freud
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I had some words with my wife, and she had some
paragraphs with me.
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"Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We
take time to go to
a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight,
dinner, soft music
and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays."
- Henry Youngman
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"I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for
two years."
- Sam Kinison
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"There's a way of transferring funds that is even
faster than electronic
banking. It's called marriage."
- James Holt McGavran
========================================...
"I've had bad luck with both my wives. The first one
left me and the
second one didn't."
- Patrick Murray
========================================...
Marriage is the process of finding out what kind of
man your wife would
have preferred.
========================================...
Marry not a tennis player. For love means nothing to
them.
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Two secrets to keep your marriage brimming
1. Whenever you're wrong, admit it,
2. Whenever you're right, shut up.
-- Nash
========================================...
The most effective way to remember your wife's
birthday is to forget it
once..
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My wife only has 2 complaints. Nothing to wear and
not enough closet
space.
========================================...
You know what I did before I married? Anything I
wanted to.
-- Henny Youngman
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My wife and I were happy for twenty years.
Then we met.
-- Rodney Dangerfield
========================================...
A good wife always forgives her husband when she's
wrong.
-- Milton Berle
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Marriage is the only war where one sleeps with the
enemy.
-- Anonymous
========================================...
A man inserted an 'ad' in the classifieds: "Wife
wanted". Next day he received a hundred letters.
They
all said the same thing: "You can have mine."
========================================...
First Guy (proudly): "My wife's an angel!"
Second Guy "You're lucky, mine's still alive."
========================================...
"I haven't spoken to my wife in years. I didn't want
to interrupt her."
- Rodney Dangerfield OMG THAT'S HILARIOUS! Looooooooool, very good. lmao Very funny.
Worth the read. |
