Would you like to learn the language of your cat?

Miaow
Feed me.

Meeow
Pet me.

Mrooww
I love you.

Miioo-oo-oo
I am in love and must meet my betrothed outside beneath the hedge. Don't wait up.

Mrow
I feel like making noise.

Rrrow-mawww
Please, the time has come to tidy the litter box

Rrrow-miawww
I have remedied the cat box untidiness by shoveling the contents as far out of the box as was practical.

Miaowmiaow
Play with me

Miaowmioaw
Have you noticed the shortage of available cat toys in this room?

Mioawmioaw
Since I can find nothing better to play with, I shall see what happens when I sharpen my claws on this handy piece of furniture

Raowwwww
I think I shall now spend time licking the most private parts of my anatomy.

Mrowwwww
I am now recalling, with sorrow, that some of my private parts did not return with me from that visit to the vet.

Roww-maww-roww
I am so glad to see that you have returned home with both arms full of groceries. I will now rub myself against your legs and attempt to trip you as you walk towards the kitchen.

Gakk-ak-ak
My digestive passages seem to have formed a hairball. Wherever could this have come from? I shall leave it here upon the carpeting.

Mow
Snuggling is a good idea.

Moww
Shedding is pretty good too

Mowww!
I was enjoying snuggling and shedding in the warm clean laundry until you removed me so unkindly.

Miaow! Miaow!
I have discovered that, although one may be able to wedge his body through the gap behind the stove and into that little drawer filled with pots and pans, the reverse path is slightly more difficult to navigate.

Mraakk!
Oh, small bird! Please come over here.

SsssRoww!
I believe that I have found a woodchuck or similar animal.

Mmmrowmmm
It is certain that the best tasting fish is one you have caught yourself.

Mmmmmmm
If I sit in the sunshine for another hour or so, I think I shall be satisfied.

Mreoaw
Please ask room service to send up another can of tuna fish.

Mreeeow
Do you serve catnip with that?

Mroow
I have forced my body into a tiny space in order to look cute. How am I doing?

Miaooww! Mriaow!
Since you are using the can opener, I am certain that you understand the value of a well-fed and pampered cat. Please continue.

Not bad!
I think though that as I have a half Persian and a half Siamese that their vocab is maybe a little different!
I am currently trying to decipher the MRRRRAAAOOOOOOW that one of them is making.
I think it is "I have my claws stuck in the carpet under the bed and am unable to attend for the meal you are offering me. HELP!"
Or something like that!

how do you say stop scratching my f***in new leather sofa or i'll bury you in the garden alive lol

lol great!

OMG you are so gifted could you learn us all DOG lingo too:(

I don't have a cat so how could I learn the language of something I don't have? You lose!

meow
all about me are dangers, weather percieved for real or imagined;

LOL that's great, love it! Mrooweowowowowahoo

what about when they trill?

I'm a cat already I'm a expert

hahahahahahah whats the one, get away from me dog or ill scratch your eye out!

awww, how cute!

can you please tell me how to tell next doors cat to stop s.h.itting on my lawn.

I like these ones the best! THEY ARE FUNNY!!

MROWWWWW
I am now recalling, with sorrow, that some of my private parts did not return with me from that visit to the vet.
ROWW-MAWW-ROWW
I am so glad to see that you have returned home with both arms full of groceries. I will now rub myself against your legs and attempt to trip you as you walk towards the kitchen.
GAKK-AK-AK
My digestive passages seem to have formed a hairball. Wherever could this have come from? I shall leave it here upon the carpeting.
MIAOOWW! MRIAOW!
Since you are using the can opener, I am certain that you understand the value of a well-fed and pampered cat. Please continue.