I need to finally be over my relationship in my heart and in my head.?

I'm 25, I had a g/f for 2 years, then she breaks up with me out of the blue when I got back from Iraq.This was almost 9 months ago. I tried meeting other people, it doesn't seem to be working. I am not as social as I used to be, I think because of bad relationships of friendship & dating over the years. The majority of the guys I dated cheated on me. Even 9 months later I cry a lot over the break up w/the g/f. I have tried meeting other girls, but it doesn't work. I'm not sure I like guys sexually anymore. I seem to be reverting back to my shyness from high school as I get older. When I returned from Iraq, and I had thoughts of moving in together and being happy forever. Here I am single and depressed. I don't eat very unhealthy or drink much alcohol, I try praying. I don't care about myself when I am not with someone. I feel like I live to be with them. I think I have borderline personality disorder. there isn't enough space here to write everything. I can't afford a counselor

You shouldn't be so hard on yourself. It takes time to move on after a loving relationship has ended. What you need to be concentrating on right here and now - is YOU. Start out slowly, but make sure you are eating the right foods, taking a multi-vitamin, and getting out for a nice relaxing walk each and every day (start out with fifteen minutes and move up). Be in the here and now. Focus your mind on the good things you have right now. A secure place to sleep. A neighborhood you enjoy. A job you enjoy. Simple every day things. Slowly but surely you will come to love who YOU are and what life is offering you. Don't close your mind to it. Then... you'll be ready to give the healthy love you have inside of you to someone else. Hang in there, ok?

Just take one day at a time and life will unfold for you as it should! Report It

just keep yourself busy

well i think you definately need some counseling. you should have military benefits that would pay for you to be seen by someone, or you should contact your local mental health facility and ask them what they can do.Im sure they can fix it where you can see someone.And you have to live for yourself,you cant focus your life on living for others. In the end, you are the only one you can truly count on.So get out there and enjoy life a little.Get a hobby, try something daring, that will put that spark back into your life. good luck.