One out of the many conflicts that took place in the Secret Annex was between Anne and Peter. The conflict between them was basically that they were two different people, with different perspectives towards life. Anne and Peter both go to the same school, though they never truly met. Anne was a delightful and a sweet thirteen year old girl. She was very outgoing and wasn鈥檛 afraid to show her feelings. Peter was an awkward, self-conscious sixteen-year-old boy. In contrast to Anne, Peter is quiet and generally keeps his thoughts and feelings to himself. Peter didn鈥檛 really have any experience with girls as he stated 鈥淚 didn鈥檛 have any dates鈥? Peter enjoys his relationship with Frank, but he never fully opens up to her. He prefers solitude and has little in common with Frank beyond their unusual living situation. She is essentially the exact opposite of Peter. Both, Anne and Peter have there moments where they can鈥檛 stand being with each other or being away from each other.
There were many events that caused the conflict between Anne and Peter to continue. One of the events was when Peter called Anne 鈥淢rs. Quack Quack鈥? Everyone in the Secret Annex was waiting wordlessly for there signal from Mr. Van Daan that it was okay to get up and about. Once he gave the signal, everyone reached for there shoes. Peter reaches for his shoes but they weren鈥檛 there. He asked Anne 鈥淗ave you seen my shoes?鈥?Anne innocently denies it. Peter makes a lunge for her determined to get his shoes back. They both fell to the floor wrestling for the shoes. Peter becomes self conscious and then goes off to feed Mouschi his dinner but Anne demands that she鈥檒l do it. A couple minutes later, Anne comes out of Peter鈥檚 room dressed in all of his clothes. She says 鈥淕ood evening, everyone. Forgive me if I don鈥檛 stay. I have a friend waiting for me in there. My friend Tom. Tom Cat. Some people say that we look alike. But Tom has the most beautiful whiskers, and I have only a little fuzz. I am hoping . . . in time.鈥?Peter says 鈥淎ll right, Mrs. Quack Quack!鈥?Peter called her Mrs. Quack Quack because he heard how she talked so much in class that they all called her Mrs. Quack Quack. This event caused the conflict to continue because Peter and Anne were becoming more irritated, and even more involved with each other. There constant arguments are actually what are making them attracted to each other more and more. Another event that caused the conflict to continue was there first kiss. Anne and Peter were chatting about past experiences with there friends and what might they do when they get out of the annex. Anne wanted to be a journalist because she has a passion for writing. Peter wanted to go off someplace and work on a farm, something that didn鈥檛 take that much brains. Anne questioned why he would because he was better than she was a dozens of things. He was great at arithmetic and algebra. Then Anne said 鈥淵ou like Margot, don鈥檛 you? Right from the start you liked her, liked her much better than me.鈥?Peter denied that he was interested in Margot. Then Anne started to babble on how Margot was so much more beautiful, sweet, and brighter then she was. Peter said鈥?I don鈥檛 agree I think you鈥檙e pretty鈥? Anne didn鈥檛 believe him. Afterward he said that she has changed. She went from being awful noisy to being quiet. They converse for a while longer about there connection. There is a second of silence afterwards and then Anne speaks and says 鈥淧eter, have you ever kissed a girl鈥? Peter answered with a simple 鈥淵es, once鈥? He said he was at a party and they were playing one of those kissing games. Anne supposed that really didn鈥檛 count. Then, after a while of explaining there first kiss, Anne stands there longing for Peter to kiss her. Then suddenly he grabs her and kissed her on the cheek. She walks out astonished and kisses her mother and father goodnight. This event was very significant in the story. It led to a romance between Anne and Peter. They both have come clean about there past experiences with the opposite sex. The conflict between them would continue because they have kissed and will now not be there normal arguing self鈥檚. They may be nervous to be near each other or feel uncomfortable.
The conflict between Anne and Peter was resolved. They end up being a couple that will stay with each other through the tough times of the war. They will not have there occasional arguments. Although the overall conflict which was the war was not resolved; Anne and Peter both remained loyal. Anne鈥檚 memorable quote was 鈥淚t's really a wonder that I haven't dropped all my ideals, because they seem so absurd and impossible to carry out. Yet I keep them, because in spite of everything I still believe that people are really good at heart. Anne Frank spoke those words towards the Green police for all they have done. On August 4, 1944, about twenty five months after they went into hiding, Anne Frank and everyone in the secret annex were captured. Anne and Peter were both separated and put into concentration camps. Many problems with "there" and "their".
"The conflict between them was basically that they were two different people, with different perspectives towards life." doesn't sound right. "This conflict was sparked by their differing personalities and perspectives towards life" would be better.
"Anne was a delightful and a sweet thirteen year old girl." should be "Anne was a sweet, delightful thirteen year old girl."
I would make more corrections, but frankly, I'm lazy. "there" does NOT equal "their". There's numerous uses of "there" instead of "their". Use "there" when you're talking about a place, use "their" when you're talking about someone (ex: Those girls take forever doing their hair). "They're" is only to be used if you are saying, "they are" like, "They're gone to the park today".
Break things into paragraphs. Paragraphs should include a single thought or time period. Paragraphs should not be one page. You can split the "body" of an essay into many paragraphs.'
Stop using names to begin every sentence. Be more creative. Instead of saying "Anne" say, "she" or find a more creative way of writing the sentence.
Your first sentence should be "One, out of the many, conflict..." commas are awesome. As a rule of thumb, when you're putting commas around part of a sentence, the sentence should still make sense when you exclude the comma-ed parts. For example, for your first sentence, you can say, "One conflict that took place in the..." see how the sentence still works if we remove the comma-ed section.
You really should put this in the writing section. |
