I just want to suffocate or pass out because someone won't leave me alone, how do I cope?

I feel hopeless. I'm supposed to recover by taking pills because I'm having serious mental issues, I'm not out of control though in a physical condition but my mind is & my psychiatrist said I鈥檓 really close to going to a mental hospital again. I just want to suffocate because I can't do anything & thoughts of him just keep on rushing into my head. I can't even be by my mother's side all the time because of the mental condition I'm in & my mom鈥檚 really sick too. I'm constantly getting thoughts of this guy in my class who wouldn't stop staring at me. There's been many times when this guy wouldn't leave me alone, I even had a counselor meeting with him. We're both in 8th grade; we're not friends or anything. He knows I hate him very much because of all the things I suffered because of him. My mental condition got so much worse because of him & he knows that but it seems like he's trying to make it worse. I can't take it anymore. He wouldn't stop talking to me, and even stare even though I asked him to leave me alone multiple times. I feel hopeless now. Everything I do, thoughts of him tormenting me just rushes into my head like a flood & causes my heartbeat to beat faster & makes my mental condition get worse. I鈥檝e been getting headaches constantly weeks ago & I told him that but he still wouldn鈥檛 leave me alone. He only does this to me. There鈥檚 no way I can鈥檛 have a reaction because of the condition I鈥檓 in. I just want to go to the kitchen & grab a knife & stab myself right into my chest. He stares at me through glass reflection, across the room, when I鈥檓 laughing, eating, you name it! I don鈥檛 know what he wants from me, he drives me nuts! What the ****? Someone please help me. No, my mom can鈥檛 help me鈥he鈥檚 very sick. Goddamn, I have so much **** going on in my mind.

You guys, please help. I'm trying to hold on as much as I can. I can't even do any simple tasks because of the thoughts, thoughts!

Gloria,
Your feelings will become your undoing. Relax, they are not helping with such extremes, and you can't trust their instructions in such a state. You need to learn control. It might not seem like it, but these feelings can be a great benefit to you, if you learn to control them a little. Totally out of control, they can destroy you. The first step is to calm yourself, and learn to view these events in a more logical way. Start slow, and learn how to make emotions work for your benefit in small steps. Every great journey begins with a first step, and the long road to emotional control will take time and discipline to achieve.
Steve

don't let him get to you.
if it comes down to it just hit him in the face and that should stop him from staring at you all the time.