Am i right or wrong>?

i have lost contact with my mother for several year(her and my father were divorced and i am close to my father) and i recently regained it. she just a couple of months ago met my 4 kids and now she has her heart set on being in the delivery room when i have my 5th. the truth is, its a love hate relationship. she loves to smoke and drink and that is the reason they got divorced. however, i love her when she is sober, but that is not often. she tries to take my kids to the park but i will not let them go alone with her. i do not fully trust her, and just kinda happened to regain touch. she thinks she will be in the delivery room but i dont want her in there. i am very close to my father and for my one year olds birth he sat in the waiting room with my triplets, and he will do the same with this birth. i have suggested that my mother sits in the waiting room and maybe gets to know my kids a littl more( there grandpa will also be with them so i am not too worried) but (c)

she refuses. how do i tell her i dont want her in there? i just got back in touch with her and our relationship is doing better and i dont want to hurt it. it is nothing personal its just the only other person i want in there is my husband. maybe if she was around more in my life i could consider it, but i just cant let this woman who was hardly a mother to me in there.....what should i do?

Oh honey!!! it was like reading my own story there!!! When I had my first baby my mom after years of a strained relationship felt it was her right to be there. It was terrible. She is the same way with the drinking and such and it made me angry and stressed that I had to even deal with it. I finally just sather down and said look I just feel comfortable with my hubby being there because I don't want anyone in my family seeing my down theres..lol. Unfortunately I had to make it seem like it was MY fault so she would get all butt hurt. She happened to be out of town when I gave birth so it made it easy but it was terrible to go through and I amsorry! :(

perhaps you can talk to your doctor and let him know that you dont want anyone else in the room besides your husband. when the time comes that your about to have your baby, he can probably tell everyone to leave and make him out to be the bad guy. im sure doctors dont mind that!! they would rather you be less stressed when you are trying to bring a baby into the world! you need to be thinking about that instead ya know!

if you dont want to do that, im not sure...besides just coming out and saying that you dont want ANYONE in there besides your husband, its nothing personal. But its up to you who stays and who goes.

Tell her that you don't want to make the other kids feel left out by her witnessing this birth but not the other 4. She should take a hint, if not just be honest with her, tell her I just want it to be me and (husband's name) like it was for the other births. She definately should understand. Good luck and congrats on all the children!

i would say that my husband and i want to be the only ones in the delivery room hope that doesnt h