What's right and wrong for relationships? Am I insecure, or being toyed with?

So my boyfriend and I meet via internet on an adult hook up sight. It took me six months to work up the nerves to finally meet this guy but I finally did! I thought he was great, everything I wanted! The only problem was I was going back to school. He鈥檚 an older guy claiming to be 33 but more in the range of 38. The relationship started rough enough both of us not knowing what we wanted until; I told him I wanted to date! He said he felt the same way and readily agreed. For the first time in my life I was happy to call someone my boyfriend! I immediately fell in love for the first time, I was on cloud 9. At first we communicated via the internet site. Then the nagging question came into my head, would he be willing to hook up with someone else knowing I鈥檓 not around?! So I faked an email to him from a local and I used a picture of my friend. He took that bait, telling him where he worked, giving him his phone number and even had the nerve of saying discretion is good. I immediately called him out on it! He said he鈥檇 do anything to get me back in his life, he said he didn鈥檛 know we were going out! I agreed and have been dating him for about 1 month since then. He got rid of his account and no longer use it. Instead we talk on the phone every night before bed and send each other emails to our actual accounts. Everything seems great but we go out to restaurant and he flirts hard core with good looking staff members. He engages them in long conversations that I have to sit through, all the time thinking who the hell does this guy think he is?! He even gave out his name where he worked and received a phone number from an individual. He鈥檚 a contractor of a restaurant and said he was just trying to fill the place with servers for opening night!
The story gets worse because he鈥檚 leaving to go back to Florida but has sworn his allegiance that he鈥檚 coming back for me! He鈥檚 going to Florida to visit his ex wife and his kids for a week. Where he planned sleep in the same bed as her. And 1 month before we started dating he had sex with, I told him he has to stop that he鈥檚 just confusing her. He also told me that if she was giving him head that he wouldn鈥檛 stop her. He is then going to spend 3 weeks in a beach house with this ex of 10 years. He tells me not to worry but should I? We were friend first and he had forgotten he told me he has had sex with his ex too! He also has a myspace account that he meets these young people on and they call him. He tells me they鈥檙e just lost and need someone to talk too. I think its bullshit, why does a random 38 yr old man give a 15yr old his number in the first place? Anyway the **** hit the fan so to say last night when he called me at the bar, but before he talked to me he shouted across the room to this woman, 鈥淵ou鈥檙e ******* hot鈥? 鈥測ou should buy a peach bikini鈥? it鈥檚 a good color with you! I called him out on it at once! He said its just his personality and I cant change who I am, he used to be a DJ! Regardless I told him how much it hurts me and that it get to the point of making me physically sick! He tells me I鈥檓 insecure and that the only person he鈥檚 going home with is me, so don鈥檛鈥?worry! I鈥檓 willing to admit I鈥檓 insecure, but I think he鈥檚 doing a hell of a job of making me feel that way! He really is a great guy but I need someone who is 100% committed, what should I do? He also claims that he has never felt love like this and has even accused me of playing him as a game! I also feel sometime that I鈥檓 more of an adult than he is! When I said dating me means no, kissing, hand holding, and oral sex with anybody but he said he was unaware that I meant all those. We decided last night that we鈥檇 both work on or issues, but I honestly feel that mine have more merit. Is it justifiable for me to ask someone to change his personality? Or is he just hiding behind this to save his own skin, to continue being a player? When I was angry at him I told him he鈥檚 going to have a hell of a job trying to find a younger person willing to put up with all this, especially his flirtatious nature. I thinking that I `can鈥檛 let go because it my first love, and I鈥檝e always been one of those people who have always made others happy over myself

I was told the other day... If it walks like a duck, quacks like a duck, it is a duck. Trust your instincts. He lied from the beginning. It may have been about something small like his age. But all big lies stem out from small. A relationship can't work when there is no trust. Remember what YOU deserve. You deserve honesty and someone to treat you as you treat them. Like I said, trust your instincts, if you have a feeling something is just not right...It's probably not.

Let him go. Find someone who is your style. Not some loser jerk like this guy!

oh god.. just dump the looser. he's obviously very selfish and sounds like he cannot commit. You deserve better!!

You are connected with a narcissist. He is an attention seeker and doesn't care who the attention comes from.

Take it from someone who was married to a narcissist. This guy will take you for granted, disregard your desires and needs, will pour himself into conversations with strangers and you will be left feeling helpless.

You need to take this time, while he is in Florida, and get your head right. Clear out the negativity, clear our the feelings you felt for him. I know it's only a week but it's time you have to yourself without his influence.

Getting your self-worth and self-control back is the most important thing. Don't let this snake oil salesman talk you back into going out with him. You deserve better, even if you have to be single for a while and wait for that to happen.

seriously