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10 points Please double check my grammar. English is my second langauge.?


Dear Hiring Manager,

I am interested in applying for a Volunteer and Community Affair Coordinator position. The skills that I have developed from work experience, academic background, and philosophy support my strong interest in the program.

As indicated in the accompanying resume, I have recently earned the degree of Master of Public Administration from Bowie State University, where I worked as a Graduate Assistant to the Chair for 2 years. In addition, I was an intern at the Royal Thai Embassy
and actively involved in many non-profits and public organizations and professional development trainings. These experiences have given me an opportunity to effectively practice my skills in planning, researching, decision-making, team and systematic working, as well as organizing. I am a hard worker who is highly motivated and dedicated to accomplish tasks efficiently.

I would appreciate a few minutes of your time to discuss my qualifications. If you have any questions please feel free to contact me by phone or E-mail. Thank you very much for your time. I am looking forward to hearing from you soon.

Respectfully yours,

Hope

Yes. I want to double checks it. Please, it is important to me..

It looks fine to me

I would take out "I would appreciate a few minutes of your time to discuss my qualifications" and put id something like, "with your premission, I will call you at 10:)) AM on June 12 to discuss my qualifications."

Be pro active..

Also , if you are in the US on a Green Card or are a US citzen, put that in the letter and on your resume. Many companies are reluctant to hire people on a student visa, because they have to get you an H-1B, and that is hard to do.

Good luck

Only problem would be that at the bottom of the second paragraph it needs to say "highly motivated and dedicated to accomplishing tasks efficiently." Rather than just "accomplish."

Didn't you just post this up a day or two ago?

Okay. It looks nice to me. Just a few grammatical errors:
for "Dear Hiring Manager," put a : (colon) instead of a , (comma)

in the second paragraph, take off the 's' in non-profits and the 's' in trainings....(i dont believe you need a comma after hard worker....no, i dont think so)

in the third paragraph, put a comma after questions and lower case the 'e' in E-mail.

I think you should change "Respectfully yours," to "Sincerely,"

Other than that, i think you already know to put the heading (company's address right above the "Dear Hiring Manager:" and your address w/o your name at the top right corner)

It looks really nice, and I would never know you were ESL from reading it. Have a blessed day, and I'll pray that you get the job!

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