Why doesnt my dad have any say in my life?

today is thanksgiving, and most importantly, my bday, and my mom os pissing me off so much. i just wanted this week to be all about me for once, so i did have a bit of a bitchy attitide, but only bcuz i wanted this jacket to keep me warm for the winter bcuz i do not have ONE jacket for the winter so all i do is walk around in short sleeves or if im lucky, wear one of my friends jackets while my bother has about 10 jackets and he only wears one. i was gonna pay for it w/ my b-day money too, but she just wanted to make me miserable for my whole life so she just said no and started screaming at me, in the middle of the mall in front of my friends making a huge scene that i will never forgive her for. we were just fighting and my dad just happened to walk into the room and all he did was ignore the whole thing, i knew he knew i was right bcuz after we fight, he always secretly comes up to my room to make me feel better. well that really pisses me off bcuz i am getting yelled and screamed at for no reason and he cant say a word bcuz hes scared my mom will yell at him., well, i am at the point where i am thinking of just killing myself because i have had enough. i just with they would divorce and i could live happily with my father in peace. at least when my dad gets mad at me, he doesnt start yelling and screaming and making me cry AND WANT TO KILL MYSELF. he just clamly says whats bothering him and he says it in a dissapointed tone, which really makes me feel bad and WANT to apologize and never do it again. but all this woman i do not even want to call my mom does is yell and tell me 'i have feelings too" and 'you really hurt me' when i didnt do sh*t. i just dont understand, why would he marry a woman i he knew he couldnt have a part in his daughters life, and if he didnt know, why doesnt he just divorce her? because i can see they dont get along very well w/ or w/o me and my mom gets her feelings hurt too easially. i can tell he doesnt even think my mom is pretty bcuz, everytime he comes to a parent/teacher conference w/ me, i can see his true gentlemen come out, only when he sees my social studies teacher. anyways, can someone plz help me, because if i can make things better now, then im gonna still be pissed and have an attitude w/ my mom and she wont let me go out tonite, ON MY OWN BIRTHDAY. and i swear if that happens, she will never forgive herself for it.

Happy Birthday.
But, Whoa, that's big.
Sounds like there's a lot going on.
First, suicide is never really an option. There's a reason why you're here, and maybe things suck for a while, but that reason needs you. And that reason might not be right in your face, but it's there.
Second, your folks getting a divorce is something that you can't really expect. Some people in this society think staying married is the best thing they can do for their kids, even though there is research to the contrary. I think they're brainwashed, and, trust me, it's hard to unbrainwash anyone.
Third, your relationship with your mother probably has more going on in it than you can see. When I was 5 my father divorced my mother, got custody of me and my older brother, and got remarried. Our step-mother took me aside and told me she didn't like me and why. I had a terrible relationship with her for the next 6 years, but at least I knew why. That's not something you have, because mothers don't usual tell there kids this stuff and it's also quite likely that she doesn't even know it. It's all trapped away in her subconscious mind. I know that one first-hand even. I have my own son now. He's 9 and I'm raising him without his mother, and sometimes I wish I was nicer to him. He just pisses me off a lot, and I don't know why.
Fourth, you know that your father loves you. That was something I didn't have. Sure, I thought that my dad would disagree with my step-mom, but he never came to me to sympathize, so I thought he really didn't care. After he divorced her, I got to see him a little differently. He didn't have the balls to stand up to her, because he felt that he had no idea about how to parent. Now I know everybody's guessing at how to parent.
I suggest you hang in there, and talk with your folks more about your feelings without yelling. And remember to thank them for any and everything--parents are suckers for that kind of stuff.

Wow. You give "drama queen" a whole new meaning.

Get over yourself, honey.

Suicide is not a joke, and people who are actually struggling with it have a serious problem. This is over a stupid coat.

You're acting like a spoiled, self-centered child. Your first sentence says it all. Why in the world do you figure this week should just be about you, for once? Today is not "most importantly your birthday." Royalty that you are, for the rest of the country, today might also be a day to be thankful, to spend with friends and family, and enjoy yourself. You've interpreted the parts about friends and family, and enjoying yourself, to mean it's just about YOU enjoying yourself. Not true.

You've completely missed the part about giving thanks, because you don't appear to be thankful for anything. You appear to be an ungrateful little brat.

And there are several reasons you dad might not have jumped in. Maybe he doesn't like confrontation, doesn't want to hurt either of your feelings, or didn't think it was something worth fighting over. It might even have been that he felt you deserved the tongue-lashing you were getting, so he didn't step in and stop it.

Happily imagining your parents divorcing and your social studies teacher being your new mommy is just wrong. And because he's a gentleman and friendly with her, that does not mean he doesn't think your mom is pretty.

The sooner you realize the world does not revolve around you in every way, the sooner you (and especially the people you know and torment) can be happy and content in life.

She is your mother. She deserves respect. And no, she does not have to "respect" you by doing everything you want her to.

Stop making stupid little threats to kill yourself over something as mundane as your mom not buying you the coat you want, or not letting you go out "ON YOUR OWN BIRTHDAY." She's allowed to make that call, because she's the parent.

Grow up. You want to be treated like a mature person, then be mature.