Not really sure how to handle this situation with friend?

I don't have too many real friends. Honestly, I kind of prefer it that way. However, one of my best friends for the past 5 years has a recurring problem. She constantly blows our plans off, sometimes to hang out with other people, and then lies about it or just doesn't follow through. Constantly. I never call her out, but I've repeatedly asked her to just be honest with me. She pulls this with her other friends, too, and tells me about it.

Example from yesterday:
She calls/texts me 3 times in the morning to hang out. I call her back, and we make plans to go to a party. She says she'll call me when she gets off from work at 8:30. I get all dressed up and sit by the phone. It's 9:00 and no call. I text her, no response. I call her, she doesn't answer. Then I get a text 10 minutes later that says she's "still at work, will call me a bit later." At 11:30, figure she's probably not going to call and go to sleep. Still no word or apology today. I'm really fed up and not sure what to do.

I want to keep her friendship, but I don't know what else to do. I've talked to her about this and she still does these incredibly inconsiderate things. It really frustrates and confuses me.

Just tell her how you feel and tell her you don't think you want to make plans with her anymore until she learns to treat your time and friendship with more respect.

She doesn't sound like a great friend. If you aren't going to drop her I would suggest to at least not make plans with her.
Consider her a "spontaneous" type friend and only hang with her when the opportunity is right in front of you. I would even tell her that I refuse to make any plans with her because of her track record and how she leaves people hanging.

i dont have any tolerance for these types of people. my friends would never do anything like that to me. they know better. i think that you should not make a lot of plans with her anymore. shes not worth it

call her out on it alot. and when she wants to hang out with you, make her promise to follow through. if she doesnt then shes not a repsonsible friend and not a very good friend i guess. =]

Tell her what you wrote. Be calm and sit her down. Try texting it to her when you haev her atttention. or say no next time. She's not really a good friend if she doesnt' say sorry etc etc

she doesn't seem to be a good friend if she keeps blowing you off to hang out with people you don't know

tell her the truth or appogise then make out lol jkjkjk

Call her out on it. She is not bein g a good friend right now. Talk to her about it

IL be ur friend

The easy solution here would be, don't make plans with this girl. You already know she's not going to follow through, so stop setting yourself up to end up with hurt feelings. Don't stop being her friend, some friends are better handled when you talk to them when they call you, hang out when they show up to hang out with ya. Also, you can still make plans of your own, tell her where you'll be for if she wants to show up herself, and then.. go on with your plans. Why sit and be bored off your butt waiting, when you can at least be having a good time without the unreliable friend?

You need to explain to her why your upset, tell her it makes the friendship intolerable and also tell her that if she makes plans and doesn't keep them, you are going to do the same thing as well.

She obviously doesn't consider herself your real friend, let alone a best friend or should we at least be honest with you.
Its your choice whether you want to keep being friend with her, but I can tell you, if you do it will mean more problems and frustration.

I think the best way is to show her how it feels, sometimes thats the only thing that gets through to people.

Maybe you all should try to work it out it shows that she doesnt want to talk to you the best thing to do is dont call her and see if she calls you.She knows that if she doesnt call you that you will rush and call her and she can basicly do you how she wants.Because she know that you will jump and call her.So try and tell her how you feel and if it doesnt work.Just dont worry about the best thing to do is find a new friend.Trust i know i went thru this same thing last year with my and i was tired of it and when i tryed to tell her shell get mad so she hasnt called me and im not going to call her.She has my number just like i has hers.So i feel where your going.She has stood me up at my birthday party to go to another friends party.So take my advice email me if you have any questions.

It is very interesting that you said you do not care to have too many firends. This means you are very selective, yet you selected a friend who does not come through for you, breaks plans when something better comes along ( and likely brags about this to others, as she brags to you about what she does to them) and is not likely to come through when you really need her. This may mean you have a fear of really connecting with other people, for, as much as this behavior frustrates you, you have selected it for yourself and tolerated it until now. By identifying how much it disturbs you, you have taken the first step to changing the situation. You need to have a straight up conversation with your friend, telling her how her inconsistency as a friend bothers you.

The fact that she brags about doing this is evidence that what she is doing makes her feel powerful, popular and in control, but to you and her other friends it feels selfish and inconsiderate. She is not likely to change this behavior unless she risks losing friends over it. Let her know it puts your friendship at risk.

Well no one deserves to be treated that way. I understand that you want to still be her friend, but maybe being her BEST friend isn't so great at the moment. I would say to kind of go your own way for a while, but still talk to her every now and then, and try to get together with more of your other friends. But if you're willing enough, slowly step away from her because she may never change, so you may have to change your friendship.

Best of luck

~ Natalie

well i sometimes do that to some people, mainly people i don't like, but i don't make the plans. like they'll make the plans, i'll feel bad and say ok, and then i say something comes up, and i usually lie, about it. but this is only to one friend, and only because everytime shes around she criticizes something about me, thus the reason i lie, i would stop being friends with her but i've been 'friends' with her for a while so i don't want to just loose that firendship.
what if somebody did that to me, is everytime she wants to get together say you have plans, give her a taste of her own medicine.
the right thing to do is tell her how you feel, and say you don't like how she does that and would appreciatee it if it stopped, threaten her to not be friends if she keeps it up. good luck!