My Husband hit our son. I don't know how to feel about this. Please read for details!?

My 14 year old son has been acting out lately, and so I confronted him about his destructive behavior, and he became very violent; he punched me and shoved me into the wall. He's bigger than me, so I was truly scared, and i had NEVER seen him behave like that EVER. In my 30 years of life, no one has ever hit me like that or scared me like that; I thought about calling the police but decided against it.
Instead, I called my husband, who came home from work early.To make a story short, my husband knocked my son down, he hit him so hard.
I'm really not sure how to handle this.
My husband was protecting me, but I don't condone hitting a child.
My son is very upset and hurt, but it's hard for me to feel sorry for him. Afterall, he busted my lip. He's never acted like this.
Where do I go from here?
What Should i do?
I feel like i have to chose here.

It's just out of the ordinary.
we're always so calm and rational, and my husband snapped.
My son had an appointment on Friday with a therapist.
I just don't know how to handle the aftermath.

talk with ur son about his behaviour. I always get beaten up by my parents for doing some thing wrong. so what big deal. If i was u i will go to the police, because that was an assault and he could get charged for it.

I think maybe your son might need anger management for his temper or counseling for what ever has him this angry. Your husband was probably just trying to teach him a lesson, but i don't think violence is the cure for violence. My husband would probably have done the same thing in this situation.

i think its wrong for a son to hit his mom so badly.....ur husband was right ,anyone in his position must have done the same thing....i think ur son has some problem why dont u try talkin to him..both of u...if its not working u shud take ur son to a psychiatrist...

I would have done what your husband did. What your son did was out of line. If I were you husband i would knock him out, tie him up, and probably make him go to a psychiatrist. This kid is seriously troubled.

Your son is 14, for Gods sake woman, wake up. The kids got problems and getting knocked on his but just may wake him up. If any son of mine hit his mother he'd find himself on the street with his but wrapped around his ears.

Wow.. Im Sorry..
Well you can try Thearopy or try to talk to him why hes very violent.. or if you want a professional answer.. call Loveline..
800-568-3191
Mon-thur. at 10pm or 11pm depends on where you live..

I would have knocked him out myself...There is something going on in your sons life right now, he may not know how to express. Find someone he can trust to talk to, you may find your answer.

So what...Its ok for your son to hit you his mother, but go without punishment, Sorry but he got wat he deserved from your Husband........How disrespectful of your son..U shouldnt feel sorry for him.......

You may want to see if your child is on drugs...or maybe needs some.I really don't feel your husband was out of line,unless he hit him with a car.

A 14 year old who hits his mother deserves to have the snot kicked out of him.

hard problem
violence is never the answer
is son on drugs ,
seek pro help
counseling...

your son got what was coming to him, shouldnt hit your mother

good i hope it hurt like he hurt you

I'm sorry, but you really should get professional help not YA help for this one. First question you must determine: Is your son on drugs? What does "acting out" mean? Skipping school. Staying out really late? Your son shouldn't be allowed to act that way. It's a crime called assault regardless of his age. I don't know what to tell you other than you should seek professional help. Nothing worked on me when I was 14, but I never physically hurt my mother.

I'm so sorry this happened. All of it.

And I'm even sorrier to say it sounds like both your husband and your son require professional intervention. Either legal or medical; if I were you I'd offer them the choice. Get a psychiatric evaluation, or you press charges.

When my daughter had just turned 14, something similar happened and I ended up sliced to ribbons with Freddie Krueger-like fake nails I had told her she couldn't wear. I offered her that choice: a psych eval or a juvie hearing. She chose the psych eval and was diagnosed bipolar, so it was the right decision.

You need immediate help.

As a son who's been knocked around and known a few sons who's been knocked around (I live in the sticks)..

I consider it normal. Guys fight. It's what some of us do. It's like some women knit.

I learned very fast to fall in to line. I've been in a fist fight with my father before. I broke his lip open, he 1 shot me and I saw stars. Since then, we've been pretty close.

And I think your husband did the right thing. Your son hit a woman. Rule number 1.. never hit a woman. He broke the unwritten code. And he's larger than you? That made his offense even worse. If someone didn't correct him the hard way.. well.. if he hit his own mother, what do you think he'd do to a girl friend or wife?

And I guarantee.. your son will think twice before ever raising his fist in anger at another woman.

Personally, I'd be disappointed if your husband did nothing. He let someone get away with hurting you.. he's not doing his job as husband, protector and provider.

You don't have to choose. What's done is done. Hubby should have really tried to find a different solution but in the same your son had no right to lay a hand on you. Next time you should call police and that way it might scare him into straightening up and flying right. Alternatively you could send you son to counselling. Try to get a bond back with him so he may open up and tell you what is going on in his life and find out why he is turning violent and acting up. Once you can get to the bottom of this things may start to get better. Also it might not hurt you to learn self defence as if your son tries it again you will be better equipped at handling it and defending yourself. Good luck. :)

I think you should have called the police. As hard as it would be to do that to your own son, it would probably have scared him enough to realize how serious it is to hit someone, ESPECIALLY his own mother! Next time (if it happens again) call the police and think of it as doing something for your son so that he will learn not to lose control and beat up someone. as for your husband, I dont blame him, but your son shouldnt have hit you, thats just plain wrong, and by calling the police, it can help him realize that.

Well it's definitely bad parenting. If you don't discipline a child properly at a young age, he/she will walk all over you. It doesn't matter how big he is. If you do the correct discipline he'll respect you for life.

Watch some Judge Judy, that's how you gotta be. I'm only 25, but I've had my discipline, whooped at times. But there's no way I would ever hit my mom and I've been boxing for 12 years.

Calling police is too American. You gotta whoop his behind and show who's boss. The father should've done that a long time ago because he may end up beating a gf or wife like that in the future.

Your husband was in the right!! I became violent as a child when my mother and father divorced. My mother had no control over me and I would hit her or break something.. when she re-married I thought I was still the boss... that is until my step dad knocked the crap out of me when he saw me shove my mother.

Men are authority figures that women just cannot be! Do you think your son would have done this is dad was at home?

Whatever you do.. DO NOT SIDE WITH YOUR SON. All that will do is reinforce that you are a target and that you have no authority.

Your son had absolutely no excuse or reason to abuse you for asking him a question. He pretty much acted out on you what you were confronting him about, his destructive behavior. On the other hand, your husband handled him in the same way your son treated you. Professional help is definitely need on both of their parts. Don't put it off because I have a friend that has twin sons, now young adults, and her husband literally hit both of them with his fists and they are both now dysfunctional and abusive with everyone. You should not have to choose anyone but a psychiatrist to see both of them or a family counselor. Technically, your son could go to Juvenile and your husband arrested for their actions. Don't put this off. This will only get worse unless something is done now!

good a child, especially a teenager needs discipline. i don't believe in abusing a child. sometimes they need to be spanked, or simply put in their place in extreme cases such as yours. as long as your husband & you explain why & how much you love him after things calm down. things should be fine. i know its hard but in the long run, its better this way. my mother didn't do a thing to my sister, & she's 19 w/ 4 kids, a ex-convict gangster for a boyfriend & still mistreats her to this day.

your husband was wrong, but you should consider therapy.