Why am I getting so much crap for wanting to bottle feed?

I'm being induced this coming Tuesday and my husband and I have decided, together, that we want to bottle feed our son. His family is fine with it. They understand that it's my body and I'm not comfortable with it, and he would like the chance to bond with the baby too. But my family is giving me problems. My mother is constantly calling me to lecture about the benefits of breastfeeding (like I haven't read all the information already) and tell me how she breastfed all 3 of her children "and look how wonderful you turned out!" (gag me.) My grandma says I'm just being lazy and selfish, and my stepdad is trying to bribe me with a huge party if I just do it for a month. (By the way, not a good idea to get a nursing mother DRUNK!) I just don't know how to handle it anymore. I'm sick of the subject since it's all any of them want to talk about, and I know they won't drop it any time soon. What do I say to my family to get them off my back and to respect the decision my hubby and I made?

The biggest thing to remember is that this is YOUR child. It is your decision to make. To have constructive comments and advice is one thing, but to be on you about it is another.

My brother and his wife went through the same thing... it seems to be a subject that some people do not want to change their minds about and all you can do is explain why you dont want to do it. Do not be influenced by guilt or bribes.

I would try to tell them, in a nice way of course, that it is your decision that you and your husband made together and feel it is best. If they keep bringing it up be upfront with them that it is bothering you and maybe it will put and end to it.

Best of luck, sorry to have written a book about it.

I had the opposite problem everyone gave me grief over wanting to breastfeed so it can go both ways. What's important is that you do what is right for you and your husband. Everyone wants to give you advice on what to do (especially family) but only you can make the best decision for yourself and your baby. There are advantages and disadvantages to both ways so it's really what works best for you. Your baby will be healthy and happy either way so congrats and good luck with everything.

the answer is in your question, tell them to get off your back and respect the decision you have made. it may sound harsh but it is the truth and they will get over it. breast feeding is a personal choice and if you don't want to do it then don't. it would not be a bonding time if you felt uncomfortable the whole time you were feeding.
good luck and stay strong.

You have to do what YOU are comfortable with because it's your body and your baby so don't let what people say make you think diffrent of what you want. I didn't breastfeed my son either because I just wasn't comfortable doing it, I try ed but ended up bottle feeding him. My son is four now and he is and always has been healthy.

Just tell them that it's not their decision--it's yours and your husband's. They'll just have to deal with it. There's nothing wrong at all with bottle-feeding a baby.

When your mom comes over and its time to feed her grandson - sit her on the sofa, hand her her grandson; hand her a bottle and let her feed him.
Sit next to them and hug them both and enjoy the bond that the 3 generations of your family will be sharing.

She will probably talk about how you were when you were that little, etc...
You may enjoy that closeness as well, I'm sure of it.

If you can have the opportunity to do this outside...even better.

then explain to her that it wouldn't be the same if you were breast feeding, but you can still bond with the child just the same.


ADDITIONAL:
to Ozi...
I had a son who I nursed every day until he passed (he was 2 months 18 days old [cot death or SIDS (crib death) as it is called in the US])
His sister I nursed for 4 months (I had to stop because I had to take her to the hospital - she was eventually diagnosed as asthmatic & is allergic to many many things- until this day - she is 16)
Their father is very allergic & asthmatic.

Folks need to be careful when they use these types of very sensitive subjects to make their point, particularly when it comes to such a personal decision as breastfeeding.
There are many ways to bond & yes while it has its benefits, the decision to do it rests on the mother -- no matter what anybody has to say.

Wow that's crazy!! Umm either really try it and tell them it won't work out, or just tell them it didn't work out with out trying it. Good news there is a big chance since you are getting induced that your milk might not even come out right, right away. So we can pray for that but with my kids because they were bottle fed first by the nurses when i went to try a breast feed them both of them didn't want it! They were use to getting it out of a bottle and not working for it!

Ok... I think the main reason they are saying this is that it provides additional nutrience and more immune protection is a baby is breastfed in the first few weeks but I haev looked up info just in case I am not correct on this and this is what I have come up with..

Breastfeeding
protects your baby from illness and infection

Babies who are not breastfed鈥?br> have a higher risk of cot death
have an increased likelihood of allergy

So while it doesn't seem like the most pleasant thing to do on the world (not something I am keen on myself but would do), perhaps should consider the idea, try it a couple of times and if it makes you that uncomfortable then switch to the bottle. As for your partner wanting to feel involved in feeding, perhaps consider a breast pump and bottling it so he is able to feed her too.

Just suggestions, feel free to take or leave them.

Because breast milk is specifically taylored to YOUR individual baby. It builds up the infants immune system, facilitates bonding with the mother, and there are studies that have shown babies who breast fed for at least 9 months had higher IQs than bottle fed babies. On top of that the formula has a lot of sugars, preservatives and chemicals in it. It was designed to be supplimental and is not nearly as healthy for your baby as breast milk. PLUS not breast feeding after delivery raises your risk of developing breast cancer.

Formula can be convenient, especially when you go out some where, and can be used supplimentally to breast feeding. There is NO QUESTION however that medically breast feeding is healthier for both you and your baby.