Why does she keep doing this?

My mom is an alcoholic, but over the past 17 days she hasn't been drunk once. I thought she was doing better, i was so happy for her! I live with my grandparents, but I was going over to her house almost everyday, I have stayed the night with her twice(i hadn't stayed in over 2 years), we have been on picnics, I have went swimming at her house everyday, we have been out to eat... But tonite she called me and she was drunk. It just hurts me so much... I really want her to do better, i want to spend time with her and be around her, but i can't be if she is gonna keep drinking! I can't freaking handle it! I don't know why I even care anymore! I just keep getting hurt. Ugh!! It just pisses me off! What can I do to show her that I love her more than anything, but I can't keep putting myself in this situation if all she is going to do is hurt me? Im so confused!!!

I can totally relate to you. My mother has been an alcoholic all my life, I'm 18 and I live in my own apartment because I simply cannot live there. You really have to accept the fact that she is going to do what she wants, when she wants to. Just because she's sober for 17 days does not mean she's better. It's really hard to build up so much hope and then have it broken by a drunken phone call. You need to take your heart out of it, she doesn't drink because of you or anyone else, she drinks because she is an addict. As soon as you can distance yourself (emotionally, not physically) from her and enjoy the good times you have together, the better it will be for both of you. You need to tell her that you are no longer going to burden yourself with feelings of disappointment because of her actions, that she can do what she wants, but you will not be involved or be there for her while she destroys her life. Tell her that she needs to get better because you want your mom back, tell her that you love her, but you need to stop worrying because it is affecting your daily life. Once you get it out of your system and accept all of it, you will be on the road to recovery, and hopefully your mom will soon follow.
I really hope everything works out for you. It will get better.
Also, Josie is right, only speak to her when she is sober. If you have to refuse her phone calls or visits when she's intoxicated, then do so. It's not fair to you to have to put up with her in that manner.

Stay with your grandparents as you have been. Tell your mom, when she is sober, how you feel. I think you should think about ala non for yourself, it may give you insight as to how to handle the situation.

It's horrible that you have to deal with this. I'm truly sorry for you. You sound like a great person with a good head on your shoulders. I wish you the very best of luck.

Tell her whats up....and when she starts drinking take the alcoholic away from her.....also when she drinks tell her the only thing she is doing is hurting you and her!!!tell her to take responsibility and your not going to talk to her until she stops!

This is so very painful for any child to experience. Encourage your mom to go to AA for support in her efforts to quit. She's shown that she can do it for a limited time but it really works better with the support of sober alcoholics. If its an open meeting you can go with her.

try to get her some help and good luck to you

I myself am dealing with an alcoholic. He goes to AA but he can go for months without drinking but sometimes he does slip. I am very frustrated with him cause I feel like he is a stronger person and should be able to handle it. You should try to get your mom to go to AA and you should go to Alanon.
It helps people like you and I learn why they do this and how to handle the situation when they do slip. Talk to your mom and see if she is up to it and let her know your going to try and be more understanding and that you will be there for her even when she slips.Giving up on her will only make it worse.
Good Luck.

sweetheart, i know, trudt me i know, i have watched my mom stumble around drunk piss the bed passed out more than enough times. my mom would go a year then all the sudden start drinking again. it got to the point where i thought she was going to kill herself. child services nearly took me away. .... im 13 i know how hard it is its like you can't count on her and have no trust it does hurt and when you realize they are drunk you cry and cry until you can't take it no more. if there was anything more i could say that would make you feel better i would but i know that what some of the others are gonna say is not going to be enough they wont understand i will say this however, learn from their mistakes, and as bad as it sounds don't put your hopes into them, you can do this. stay strong.

email me :countrygal_60@yahoo.com i will listen! i will ! i know what you are going through!