What to do if unanswered RSVPs show up to formal wedding?

I have to turn the final head count for our wedding into the caterer today. We still have dozens who have not RSVP'd. RSVPs were due 3 weeks ago, and we have called and/or emailed each of them a few times since the due date. Since I have not heard anything, I have to assume they are not coming. --it would be a huge hit to our funds if we went the other direction in our assumption!

Our wedding has assigned seating and I am afraid of what will happen if someone who did not RSVP shows up and we don't have a place and food for him or her. Many of those who have not RSVP'd are out of town guests and extended family members, who may consider themselves "expected," despite our attempts to contact them. How should we handle the situation if someone who did not RSVP arrives? I want to avoid a scene!

Thanks!

There is a buffer included in the price; they assume that people who aren't in the count will show up. However, anyone who shows up won't have a seat. :-/

It's hard to say that they have to leave after the ceremony, because there is only a 30 minute break between the ceremony and reception, which will be held in the same room.

Thank you!

The caterer will include an extra 10% to what you confirm. If you say 100 people will show up, they'll plan for 110, but only charge for 100. Don't beef up the numbers.

To accomodate anyone who shows up, but did not RSVP, I recommend that you confirm using the number of people who have RSVP'd. Instruct the decorator to set one extra table, in the back of the room. Place a reserved sign on it. Since you'll have assigned seating, this won't really be necessary, but do it anyway. Instruct the person in charge of assisting guests with their seats, to send anyone who shows up without an RSVP, to the table in the back.

This plan will help you accomodate up to 10 un-RSVP'd guests. If anymore than that show up, you can instruct another table to be set, but inform the guests that they may not be able to eat, because they weren't expected. There is a possibility that the caterer will be able to serve them with something, if the dining is through a hotel. However, if this is an offsite caterer, it is unlikely that they'll be able to accomodate the extra guests.

Good luck. This is really the most gracious way to accomodate these rude people.

When we set up our wedding budget, My mother said she could afford to pay for 150 people. We set up our budget around 150 people. If they show they show, if they don't they don't. However if we run into the problem with People who didn't RSVP,but show up, we will have food for them and not have to deal with the embarrassment of having to tell them to leave

Send em all an email and just let them know that since they didn't RSVP you assumed that they aren't coming and will not be able to accomate the... this way you won't have to worry

Though I cant answer this question I thank you for asking it because i've been wondering myself!

I would add a buffer zone into your count to include about an extra 5-10% people. Depends on if you can afford it.

Call them. If you can't reach them or they don't return your calls, Mail them a letter that the guest list is abou to be finalized and that anyone who hasn't RSVP'd by a certain date will not have a seat at the wedding or at the reception.

If they do show up after not responding, have some wall room available for them to stand at the back during the ceremony. If they are very close family or friends you can try to accommodate them for the reception, but otherwise you can have the ushers apologize and tell them that you were only able to make your plans based on the people who RSVP'd. After everyone eats, you probably won't ever have everyone seated at once.

Call them one last time. If you can't get them, assume a lack of response means a no. But please differentiate between your wedding, and your reception. They can come to the wedding, but there will be no place for them at the reception. There should not be a scene, unless THEY decide they want to be even bigger jerks than they have already been. You would need to deal with it with the caterer at the reception, if that actually were to happen.

I would contact them one last time. Be sure to say in your email or voicemail message: "our final count is due to the caterer by (date) and we won't be able to accomodate any additional attendees. We are really hoping that you can make it but understand if you cannot. Could you please call me back and let me know either way? Thanks!" If you don't hear from them, then they aren't coming and if they do then they deserve the embarrassment of not having a place to sit, etc.

You should also think about these "non-RSVPers" and how important they are to you because the way they are acting, you are not very important to them.

Sweet mother mary. This is what it comes to. You invite 300 of your closest friends and realize 50 of them don't even know who you are.
The way they handle it in Hollywood is to have "standins." People who look like certain movie stars sit in their seats at the Academy Awards etc, if the famous ones show up the standins evaporate; otherwise nobody knows the difference.
You could have bought a house with what you're spending to cater a party for people who don't give a rat's tail about you.