Do I pick between two freinds when it affects one of their businesses?

One of my friends owns a business, a call center. Another friend of ours, more like the younger brother of a good friend of ours was hired by him to handle some administrative/managerial work since he has experience in the industry. Lets call the owner Wes and the other guy Ryan.

I know for a fact that on a couple occasions recently Ryan would lie to Wes about not coming in for work because he's off-site doingsomething. He'd be online playing world of warcraft. I know because I see him.

Today I asked Wes if Ryan came to work last night, he said no he was out of the office doing something. Which is not true he was playing last night.

Do I tell wes that Ryan has been lieing the whole time, or keep it a secret so no friendships get hurt?

Wow. this is a tough one. Doesn't it suck the big one to have a conscience?

Here's a question... do you think that what 'Ryan' is doing is hurting 'Wes's' business?

To your knowledge, is 'Ryan' getting paid when he's goofing off?

When 'Ryan' is there at work, does he goof off or does he actually do work - and is his work enough that it makes up for the time when 'Ryan' goofs off?

Have you asked 'Wes' what he thinks of having 'Ryan' as an employee?

Depending on how you answer these questions, you might have the solution to your dilemma.

Some other questions are:
How important is your friendship with 'Ryan'?
I assume you'd want to be told if it were your business and 'Ryan' was goofing off when he should be working?
Would 'Wes' want to be told?
Would 'Wes' end up working it out himself?
How long do you think it'd take?
Do you think 'Wes' would fire 'Ryan'
If 'Wes' found out you knew would he be upset with you for not saying anything and is that something you'd be prepared to deal with?


Also, given that Ryan is the younger brother of a good friend, is it an option at all to talk to Ryan's older brother, suss out if this person knows what's going on and if they perhaps do ask them what they rekon should be done or suggest it's not really right.

Can you talk to Ryan and let him know you're aware that he's being a slacker and that he needs to improve or you'll let his boss know.

I'm getting the sense that you really do want to do something to fix this situation and I think 'Wes' is really lucky to have a friend like you.

I also think that because Wes isn't directly a friend of yours that does mean you don't owe him as much - that sounds bad I know, but there's a hierarchy for mates and in that hierarchy is the extent to which you go for different types of mates.

Is Ryan a part of the hierarchy where you'd cover their butt? If not, then you've got not much to lose.

Also, remember, if you allow Ryan to get away with what he's done and he continues to take advantage of his job with Wes, you're enabling him to keep doing the wrong thing. Sure, someone might catch him out and fire him one day, but till then, if he's ripping off his employer, that's not such a good thing to keep quiet about.

Good luck!

Cheers, Meg.

By keeping secrets to your friend, you are not living up to the true definition and spirit of "friendship". Whether the issue is purely business or partly personal, you have the obligation to be honest to your friend.

you can pick your friends, you can pick your nose, but you cant pick your friends nose!
so NO.