I'm posting this question again, since i have updated the site. +10 for most helpful?

Once again. My myspace address for a business myspace i created is www.myspace.com/discoverytutoring
If you could please look at this, it is for a tutoring company and tell me what you think. Are there any errors? Would this capture your attention?
There were some issues brought up. I have since take my number off the site and added additional ways to contact me. Also I believe i have corrected all the grammer. As of my age being listed as 17, I am 17, almost 18, on myspace you MUST have your age displayed, this is determined by what birthday you put in. As of listing my qualifications, not every student will have me as a tutor, I have several tutors hired, I cannot list qualifications of myself without the parents having in mind that I will be the one tutoring. Thank you for your time and thoughts.

I think it looks pretty good--as an "aging" person the background is hard on my eyes---but, I would keep it because it feels right....

My 15 year old half brother lives in Apple Valley and I hear he could use some help so I will forward the link to your myspace to our father--who knows!

Yes Thank you for taking your numbers off...if they are interested they can message you. I think you have a great idea going and I do wish you all the luck...

Still several errors to fix. Look this over real closely for typos, bad grammar, punctuation errors, etc.

Discovery Tutoring is an in home tutoring company. A highly qualified tutor will come to your home and help the student in need with homework, test prep, as well as organization skills. All set up to help the student do well in school, and to reach their education goals. Our program is located in the high desert however we will travel elsewhere. Contact us by writing us here, or discoverytutoringeh@gmail.com we are a licenced busniess.

In home consultations allow us to meet face to face with you and your child. There we will review what the goals are, go over different approaches, and review what your child is studying in school, and what they need help with. This gives us a better idea and understanding to what the child needs and what the best way is to "uncover their brilliance".

Our interest is in providing the extra help your child needs to do well in school, and in their future.
Music Education is important for everyone. We promise to help your child realize and meet their potential
--------------------------------------...

Personally, after seeing that page with all it's problems I wouldn't let you tutor anything... let alone a child.

And why would you put this on MySpace, with it's terrible image for pedophiles stalking children?

I wouldn't plan on making a living with this "service" if I were you.

Tags

　　Temporary Offices 　　Shared Offices 　　Commercial Space 　　Office Space 　　Business Services 　　Business Address 　　Call Forwarding 　　Call Handling 　　Answering Service 　　Telephone Answering 　　Mail Forwarding 　　Virtual Address

Related information

Is there another way of taking payments online without using cards.?

western union seems to b the only other option ..

...

Are calls from the "local Yellow Pages" a scam?

Be very careful. I never give out my information. This could be a spam or a mailing list compilation company. It could be identity theft or marketing companies. You never know. It is best to be saf...

Buying online, how to fill the form please, i'm italian...?

You don't need to enter anything in company unless you ship to one. Address 2 just means like: apartment 5 or something if you have more to write than just the street.

...

I have't filed income tax in 10 years. I want to come clean. CPA help needed to untangle this?

I recommend getting ahold of a professional who can advise you of the correct way to proceed. There are several legal advisors who specialize in tax law. Make sure you ask them about the "Offe...

U.S. Drug Policy?

The only "drug policy" the U.S. government has is to pour billions of dollars into the complete failure called the "War on Drugs" and make sure it locks up more of its own citiz...

Was I Taken for a ride by my dentist?

The reality is that you are indeed responsible for charges your insurance doesn't cover..."BUT", the dental office can submit a pre-procedure claim for the purpose of having the insu...

What is the best adobe Photoshop is good for me?

well photoshop CS2 would be perfect, i don't see any point in having CS3 as they are more or less identical, apart from a few slight differences that i don't think you wil need. CS2 is a ...

An Internet Lawyer required before setting up internet businesses?

Most corporate attorneys work with small businesses on a sliding scale. For an initial retainer, they provide some basic incorporation services, some general advice on startup questions, and perhap...